The Life of a Bathroom Attendant

Okay, so not many people think about what it would be like to be a bathroom attendant, but I actually was one for a while. In fact I was a few months pregnant when I first started working as one. I worked in a bar where smoking was not allowed, except for outdoors and at a bar where smoking was not allowed in the bathroom. I made sure of this because I did not want to harm my baby inside of me.

My boyfriend was the one who got me the job because he also does it as a side job for extra cash. He told me it would be an easy job, for only around 4 hours a night, and that the money would be decent. I decided it would be a good idea to have some extra cash for the upcoming baby.

This job started off the way I expected it to. Yes, I had an inventory of deodorant, perfume, cigarettes, hair products, tampons, lotion, makeup, gum, and candy that people would tip me to use. No, not everyone who used my products felt like they needed to give me a tip. Some people tipped me a five dollar bill, some a quarter. Some people stayed in the bathroom and just talked and talked, some rushed out without even washing their hands. Gross, right??

There were also several things that I didn't expect.

One night, three very heavy set women walked in, talked to each other, used the bathroom, washed their hands, tipped me, and then cornered me. One of them giggled and told me she wanted to just eat me up! Another told me that she thought I was really cute and that we should make out. The last one just laughed, grabbed my arm and told me that they were going to take turns! I laughed it off, figuring that they were joking, and said, "Sorry, I'm taken!" One girl said it didn't matter, but then they just continued giggling and walked out of the bathroom.

Another night, this very intoxicated woman walked in and smiled. Then, she stumbled to walk forward, FELL on ME, got up, and fell into the trash can! It was hilarious! Instead of being embarrassed or apologizing, she got up, went to urinate, and then left. She never returned again that night.

There was one night when some man walked into the bathroom, after a woman, grabbed her and started making out with her. Well, another woman came out of a stall, screaming when she saw the man, and ran out to find a bouncer. Of course, the bouncer had to pry them apart and escort them both out.

On one night, a woman came in, talking on her phone, and appeared to be pretty drunk. She seemed like she could barely hold herself up, so I let her sit in my chair for a minute. Well, when I turned to offer another person a towel, the "drunk" woman reached into my bag, stole my money, and ran out! I actually saw her do it! She wasn't even drunk after all! I reported the incident to a bouncer, they basically sealed off all the exits, and searched for the girl. Luckily SAPD was around and they caught the girl, who had made an escape before they sealed off the exits. A cop accompanied me to identify the girl and asked her to return the money. She looked me in the eyes and told me that she would never do that to me and that I was imagining things. However, her friend eventually gave in and admitted that they had split the money and they gave me most of what they had. The manager of the club banned both girls from ever returning.

I also had nights of women trying to feel me up, getting into fights with one another, trying to give me drunk lap dances, asking me for my number, and even throwing up right in front of me from too much drinking. Sounds like an exciting job, right??? LOL! Even so, I must admit that the cash did end up helping me a lot in the end and my boyfriend even still does it a few days out of the week.