The Most Common Mistakes by One-Time Daters

While there are quite a few ways to turn off a date, here is a list of the most common mistakes made by one-time only daters.

I'll repeat this in a little bit but remember this word "consideration". Got it? Good.

Why are you going on this date? If it's not important, then why go? Certainly, if you really don't care, then don't go on the date. Only have a date because you feel something good is happening. Boredom is a weak reason for dating, but lots of us do that. Alright, now you have a reason for this date.

Being pompous or arrogant is not attractive. Confidence is attractive. If you don't know the difference between pompous and confidence, then take the time to learn the difference. Otherwise, you've added another reason for the date not to come back.

Laughter is a great asset to dating. Using bawdy jokes to get to the laughter is very risky unless you've spent enough time to know your date. Learn what's acceptable before you launch a joke. Remember "consideration"?

Let the tension ride. You need to try to lower the tension level in both yourself and your date. Sometimes a very good way to ease things is to ask a question about your dates activities, like reading, school, hobbies, etc. Get your date talking about himself/herself and usually there is a calming since they are talking about something they know.

Inattention will kill a date fast. All you have to do is show more attention to the rest of the world than to your date and they won't come back. Undivided...undivided...undivided is the word and the action. Undivided attention is what they love. Moreover, you just might learn something from that other person as you listen and watch carefully.

Never look them in the eye. Lack of eye contact conveys all sorts of mischief to your date. They don't know why your eyes are flitting all over the place but they are going to assign a reason whether it's correct or not. And most of the time, the reason they assign will not be in your favor. If you have difficulty with eye contact, focus on their eyebrows, it will work. Or better yet, start practicing eye contact in a mirror and while you are there ask yourself "why don't I make eye contact?"

Talk about your last relationship. That is a great date killer. The last thing most daters want to hear about is your failed or successful relationships. They just don't care about the past you have created. A date is about now and next time....if there is a next time. So, stay away from the past as far as other dates are concerned; they will turn you off.

Dress like a goofball. A goofball is someone who wears a tuxedo to a high school football game. Or maybe someone who wears a bikini to an opera. Being over dressed or under dressed will ruin a date from the first minute. If you don't know what to wear, start asking questions and find out. Again, is this date important or not? Make an effort. Remember "consideration"?

A common failure is not trying. Being late or being sloppily dressed or even being less than clean are clues to your date that you really don't care. This is blatant, so very visible and very, very difficult to overcome. Not many of us want to go to public places with a partner date who is in a condition of disarray. My guess is that the date is turned off right away and won't be back.

Don't be considerate. Attention paid to your date and some simple flattery go a long way towards making a joyous evening. Notice how she/he is dressed or smiles or moves or something that you can compliment about and you will have scored a few points. Almost all of us have something to be noticed about, so find it and comment.

Don't listen. A sure way to drive someone away from you is to never listen to what they are saying. There is an old rule of thumb that says you can listen 4 times faster than you can talk. So, while your date is talking think about a question you can ask so they will keep on talking and believe you are really interested. Remember "Consideration"?