The Next Step For America's Idol, Taylor Hicks

This one should be a no-brainer, take the Soul Patrol (the fans of Taylor Hicks) and the McPheever (the fans of Katherine McPhee), and you've got a pretty huge fan base to work with. On an early article side note, what was the fan groups getting nicknames this year on American Idol all about? Third place finisher Eliot Yamin had the Yaminions as well. Interesting thought, but where was I… Oh yea, so if the American Idol brass (who totally own these kids' lives anyway) were smart they would release a CD of duets featuring both McPhee and winner Taylor Hicks. They could have them cover all the classic duets of all time like "You Don't Bring Me Flowers Anymore" by Barbara Streisand and Neil Diamond and "Unforgettable" by Nat King Cole and his daughter (okay, that one might be inappropriate). Shit, I would buy this CD. They could call it American Duets, or something stupid like that. It'd be hot.

-The Solo Route

This is what Taylor Hicks will most likely do, and it is a slippery slope. Other than Kelly Clarkson, there haven't been any American Idol winners who have made it big (Clay Aiken was the second place finisher, so he doesn't count). If Hicks does go right into the studio, he should be weary. His demeanor and singing style is already a little hackneyed; he's got to be careful he doesn't kill his momentum with an overly produced, cheese filled debut.

-Sing the Standards in Vegas

Taylor Hicks could take a page out of the Celion Dion/Elton John playbook and take his shtick right to Vegas (where it most likely belongs). Hicks is the kind of guy who belongs in Las Vegas. He seems like a drunken karaoke nut from the outskirts out of town; he shouldn't hide who he is. This way he could pocket millions (much more money than what he would make off of a hit CD) and placate directly to his already existing fan base. He wouldn't have to change a thing. He could go out and sing the exact same songs he sung week in and week out on American Idol. If he's contractedly obliged to release an album because he signed away his life to the Idol people, that's one thing. They can't tell him where or where not he can tour.

-Retire and then Return (11 years Later)

Ah, this is the almighty AI trump card. Nobody has ever won and then retired immediately after. This one would shock the nation and it would do wonders as far as creating an American Idol myth goes. Hicks should retire and then go into seclusion for at least eleven years. Then, once everyone and their mother has forgotten about, he should contact mega-producer Rick Rubin (Beastie Boys, Red Hot Chili Peppers, etc.). By this point, Hicks would have lost 35 pounds and grown a long ass, flowing, gray mane; he'd look perfect. His voice will have also changed to a gritty, tortured tone. Hicks and Rubin would hole up in a studio for about four months, working diligently on a folksy American rock album (possibly a double disc album with a limited vinyl release). The record will have a mythical, rootsy title like, "American Whispers from the Great Golden Dust". The record will be a critical and commercial smash. Taylor Hicks will be revered for all of eternity.

-Kill Himself

Having realized that winning American Idol was the best thing he'll ever accomplish, Taylor Hicks decides to commit suicide. He should probably jump off the top of the J Records office building in New York because some people will see it at as a symbolic move.