The Nowitzki-Hasselhoff Connection

Dallas Maverick and NBA superstar Dirk Nowitzki recently made a strange announcement. When asked how he concentrates during free throw attempts, the seven-footer admitted that he likes to hum a special song from his childhood. What song you ask? None other than the David Hasselhoff classic, "Looking For Freedom".

What, you haven't heard of this one? You're probably saying to yourself, David Hasselhoff? You mean the Baywatch guy?

Yes, the Baywatch guy; international TV behemoth David Hasselhoff. Most people don't that Hoffs (that's right, I call him Hoffs) is a huge recording artist in Germany. Where in most countries around the world he is known as a muscular pillar for Pamela Anderson to lean on, in Germany he is known as a muscular pillar with a voice of gold. Apparently, he has been a German pop star for quite some time. Unless Dirk Nowitzki has no concept of time, Hasselhoff has been entertaining the European nation for nearly two decades (it also wouldn't surprise me if Dirk was Tralfamadorian alien who was capable of crossing various time-scapes). If you find this information somewhat shocking, you are not alone.

I've heard (and seen) one David Hasselhoff video and oddly enough (or perhaps fittingly so) it took place near the Berlin Wall. Hoffs was wearing a jacket that looked like a cutup of LA Lights sneakers and several piano key neckties. Because of this jacket, I have no idea what the song was about or what it sounded like. It's very possible that the song he was performing was indeed "Looking For Freedom". I've come to this conclusion because of the presence of the Berlin Wall and not the awesomely bad jacket (although that jacket probably says more about freedom than the collapse of the Berlin Wall). But enough about Hoffs, this article is about a different kind of freedom; freedom of choice, the freedom to hum whatever song you want when the pressure is on in the NBA playoffs. This also brings up another problem with freedom (and freewill for that matter). Why in God's name did Nowitzki tell ANYONE this information?

He was free to do so, as he did, but should he have? The answer is no. From now until the day he dies most people (especially Americans like myself who find the concept of anyone listening to the music of David Hasselhoff completely hilarious) will remember Notwitzki not as one of the greatest NBA big men of all time (which he is) but as a corny German NBA player who liked David Hasselhoff (which he also is). To prove my point, I first heard this story on CNN. This news was deemed so funny that it became Headline News. I heard nothing about his 30 points and 20 rebounds (which I already knew about) because that wasn't important. To non-sports fans (read: the majority), the fact that Nowitzki likes to hum David Hasselhoff songs has become the only useful thing that people need to know about him. And granted nobody NEEDS to know this information. Not knowing that Dirk's favorite song is "Looking For Freedom" by the Baywatch guy isn't going to cause you to spontaneously combust. It might make you feel like you're missing something that's relevant to our already bloated pop culture, and that's pretty bad.

If you show up at the water cooler or a cocktail party and you aren't armed with information like this, you may seem uninteresting. And there is no greater crime in America than being boring (maybe gay marriage, but its close). There is no greater tragedy than being out of the proverbial loop; even if that loop is meaningless and full of sparkly denim jackets with bits of leather and blinking lights. And that loop almost always is. So it goes.