The Only Constant is Change!

It's funny how clear the day becomes after realizations are verbally expressed. I have to admit I have not felt this good in a
long time. I am happy and you know what, I deserve it! That is how I feel right now. I know this is going to last because I am very aware of what I want and how I feel.

I had one of those nights recently that is often referred to as an 'eye opener'. Yes, sometimes I need to be slapped in the
face with reality.

Someone made a comment the other day stating Maybe when things are going a little too well in your life you subconsciously try to sabotage the happiness you have acquired. Purely out of fear of losing anything positive in your life because of past issues in your life that resulted in a loss of your own personal safety of self...

That is so unbelievably true! I know I have done this a lot. How sad that I have to admit that…How sad that I wasn't able to recognize the demons that took over and almost destroyed me, my life. Why didn't anyone say anything...

Hmm…

Change is always good…the only constant is change! Ok, so that was a little reminder to myself that I can make the
intended changes and not fall apart.

With that being said let me say this, I have a lived my life for so long worrying about what others think or how they will react.
It is time to change that. I need to live for myself; I need to be honest with myself. My biggest fault/weakness is that I don't
want to hurt people. This, of course, ends up being a struggle and it eventually drags me into a rut.

One of the things I know at this point is, it is extremely important for me to maintain positive relationships. I notice that the
few negative relationships I have in my life affect my entire well being. That is just not good. It pours into my relationship, in
turn, causing problems. Yes, I'm filtering out that negativity.

I think in the midst of all the drama I forgot about the things that fueled my passion for life. I miss being involved in human rights. I miss being social. I really miss being out in the world period.