The Pinky Stinks Again

Okay, so I lied. I said, the last time this feature showed up, that, in the absence of any reader suggestions, it would be a while before another one showed up. And here another one is, two weeks later. That's hardly a while at all.

Just in case you're new to your narrator's site, this is what all the fooraw is about. Pretty snazzy stuff, eh?

In this go-around, I have decided to make the stinks a lot simpler, but, to compensate for the lack of intellectual challenge, I have added an extra one, thereby giving you, the avid bargain-hunter, ten for the price of nine. It is not for naught they call me "Mr. Nice Guy."

Before I proceed, I should note, in the last set, one of my readers commented that, during his college days, he and his friends used to play Bible and Shakespeare Stinky Pinky. Since he has been a constant, faithful and enthusiastic reader of my leavings, I thought I would give him a chance to jump to the head of the class by including one of each in this batch. That is not to say that the rest of you can't take a crack at those two, even if you do not know Obadiah from Othello. Here goes.

1. Marinas where only people who cut hair could dock their boats would be known as...

2. A jar of peanut butter purchased by a flower child would be a...

3. A famous Yankee who, had trouble distinguishing between feathers and macaroni, owned a couple of show dogs, known as...

4. A certain assassinated Roman emperor kept his unwanted hairs in check by means of...

5. The money Weight Watchers offered actress Valerie Bertinelli to stay thin could be considered...

6. People who take their trash to the landfill on a Wednesday are enjoying a...

7. When gang members come indoors, they prefer to hang their coats on...

8. At the end of the Biblical prophets' meeting, they all had a discussion about who should blow out the candles and lock up, before finally deciding...

9. Star Trek conventioneers who suffer from extreme indigestion can be said to experience...

10. A diner who found he had been given a less-expensive bivalve after he had specifically ordered Oysters Rockefeller, soon realized he had been had by the old...

Now, remember, to get the answer right to each question it must, first, somehow make sense, and then consist of two words or phrases (usually, but not always, a noun and an adjective) that rhyme. For example, a bar that was no longer allowed to sell booze, so took to vending inflatables on a string, would be a balloon saloon.

Also, in a rare moment of benevolence, your narrator is not going to be like that pr**k who writes up the Odd Men Out and insist that only his answer is the right one. If you can come up with an s-p that fills the bill completely, you can give yourself full credit, even if it is not the one Mr.-Thinks-He's-So-High...oh, right, And-Mighty put in the answer key.

By the way, for those of you who missed the Prairie Home Companion's Annual Joke Show, here was my favorite one of the bunch:

Q: Why do chicken coops have two doors?

A: Because, if they had four doors, they'd be chicken sedans.

Very well, then, pencils down and close your books. Here are the answers.

1. Marinas where only people who cut hair could dock their boats would be known as...

barbers' harbors.

2. A jar of peanut butter purchased by a flower child would be a...

hippie's Skippy

3. A famous Yankee who, had trouble distinguishing between feathers and macaroni, owned a couple of show dogs, known as...

Doodle's poodles.

4. A certain assassinated Roman emperor kept his unwanted hairs in check by means of...

Caesar's tweezers.

5. The money Weight Watchers offered actress Valerie Bertinelli to stay thin could be considered...

svelte gelt.

6. People who take their trash to the landfill on a Wednesday are enjoying a...

Hump day dump day.

7. When gang members come indoors, they prefer to hang their coats on...

bangers' hangers.

8. At the end of the Biblical prophets' meeting, they all had a discussion about who should blow out the candles and lock up, before finally deciding...

Moses closes.

9. Star Trek conventioneers who suffer from extreme indigestion can be said to experience...

nerd GERD.

10. A diner who found he had been given a less-expensive bivalve after he had specifically ordered Oysters Rockefeller, soon realized he had been had by the old...

clam scam.

I'll bet you feel as though you've been had too. Well, as I once said to J.A. Prufrock's dad, T.S., Eliot.

Sources

A Prairie Home Companion

Wikipedia

Own heretofore untapped reserves of doggerel