The Pros and Cons of Marriage Vs. Just Living with a Signifigant Other

The sanctity of marriage does it still exists today? There has been alot of controversy about couples making the decision to wed or not.In the 1950's it was basically shunned upon to "shack up" with someone before marriage and in most cases those that did such an act would be disowned by their family members.

Then came the 1960's an era of free love and sex, a hippy generation,many people had several partners and it brought on a whole new way of thinking into the realm of what was accepted in society.

Through the late 1980's and early 1990's many woman strived for the independency in the working fields as well as in their relationships.The thought of marriage was starting to seem unimportant to many,while there is that constant need for companionship the idea to still have that freedom seemed to be just as appealing.Why get married,would it ruin a good thing?

I spoke with several of my friends and a few family members about this issue and their thoughts on it.

" I believe the benefits of living together is a cheaper and a more independent way for many.It doesn't mean that you don't love the person that you are with just because you don't choose to marry them,you shouldn't have to have legal documents to prove how you feel about one another"

"Marriage is strictly a choice of the individuals,marriage takes alot of give and take,I hope to eventually get married and make that commitment and if I am able to do that sensibly then I should be able to accept anything else that might occur in the relationship sensibly and whatever happens to keep my respect and dignity intact"

" I have been on both sides of this debate, I have been married before,divorced,living with someone and now am remarried again,after a divorce it's hard to put that trust in someone else and you don't just want to jump right into another relationship that in your mind might fail.I feel that if you are committed to someone and your love is strong enough and you feel that it is going to be something that both of you benefit from as a couple then you should get married but if you are not sure then don't,it is much easier to walk away without the legal ties."

"I have been married for 44 years now and being married at such a young age I feel it was the best thing for me and my husband.You know when you love someone and you know if you want that feeling to be everlasting.To many people take marriage for granted and when something goes wrong they would rather get a divorce than work it out.Talking, being friends,being lovers,laughing and crying together are key factors in any marriage as well as any relationship and we have made it work all these years and are continuing to make it work.I believe that people that live with someone are not willing to commit to that person."

" Personally I would rather just live with someone,I have been married twice and divorced twice,so I don't have the desire to do that again.It's easier for me if I need that companionship to just spend time with someone and enjoy each others company."

" I have been married for almost 14 years,marriage to me is sacred.I married someone who is one of my best friends,we talk about any issues that may arise,we share with each other,we enjoy each others company even after all these years.I'm not saying that we haven't had our bumps in the road,any relationship does but you have to work through it unless and this is the only legitimate reason that I can think of,if someone cheats. "

" I think we should be able to just go back to free love,I love alot of people and I have a boyfriend .He is understanding and actually feels the same way that I do,we love each other but why make that commitment,why waste the time,it just doesn't make sense to me,look at Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell they're not married and are doing quiet well."

"In my situation and in my opinion,I believe that if you love someone and want to be with them then you should get married.I think that if you just live with someone you are not making that commitment and it shows distrust in your relationship.If you live with someone yes,it is easier to walk away and not have to deal with the consequences.I have been married since 2004 and would not have it any other way."

So, in conclusion to this battle of what seems to be more of a morality issue,I leave these thoughts with you.If you want a memory such as a wedding to last,make it last,don't give up and don't give in.Commit to that special someone,stand up in front of your friends and family and vow your love but don't take it for granted and don't do it for the wrong reasons or you will surely regret it.

If you want that independency and you like the idea of just having someone to be there then maybe just living with a significant other is more your path to take,whichever you choose realize that it is still a relationship and it is still love,right?