The Real (Fake) Story of Today's Hierarchy

Some time after the beginning, but far before the Earth was created, two races rose to power on opposite sides of the universe. The two races shared basic appearances, but their psychological makeup was completely different. The Children, as they came to be known, were playful, had only short-term goals, and made up for any sloppy workmanship with boundless enthusiasm. Being the intellectual equivalent of a toddler today, the Children thoroughly enjoyed destroying whatever they didn't like. The Adults, on the other hand, were cold and calculating. Their only goal was to achieve knowledge to quench their ever-growing thirst for it. They had scientists and engineers, but sought only to build.

The Adults eventually left the planet that was their home world, settling many places in search of a perfect world. They built ships that were only meant to be transports, assuming that they were the only life in the galaxy. Eventually, they stumbled upon the Children, who quickly realized the potential of such ships. The Children took over the spaceships, killing anyone in the way with crudely-made clubs and spears.

The Children spread like a disease across the galaxy, conquering worlds and leaving destruction wherever they went. The Adult leader, pressed for an answer, decided to fight back. He ordered his best scientists and engineers to build the finest weapons and the toughest armor. The Children were pushed back, though at great cost to both sides.

Finally, the leaders of the two groups met. They both had decided that war was foolish and looked for a resolution to their problem. The Children, of course, wanted complete control of the Adults, and the Adult leader, although quite intelligent, was not strong enough to resist and was captured in the negotiation room. All the Adults were put into slavery serving every whim of the Children.

The Adults simply bided their time, and when the Children once more fell to squabbling amongst themselves, they used special genetic technology to alter themselves into super-strong beings. However, when all the Children were in their grasp, the Adult leader did not have the heart to kill them. Instead, he developed a better idea; to transform them all into intelligent and rational Adults. Using their newest technology - "spools" crewed by Adults, who gave out punishing amounts of work - the Children eventually changed into Adults. The progress was long and tedious, but eventually most of the Children were metamorphosed.

Suddenly, a disaster occurred. A genetic disease struck all Adults. Only the strongest survived, and they too fell after only a short period. However, the Children seemed completely unaffected. Seeing that the disease only affected the Adults, the Adult leader had two ideas. First, the disease only targeted Adults, who were mostly scientists and thinkers, and so it was named Logic.

Second, he saw a way to save his race. He made a quick deal with the Child leader; his race and the children would be fused together, each sharing a portion of the total lifespan. They agreed that the Children, with their longer lifespan, should have the shorter end in the new creature, but that those years would most likely be its happiest, as it would be free of responsibility and hardship. One action would be required of them, in which they could become intelligent through the adult's own torture chamber - schools. The Adults, with their intelligence and constant quest for happiness, would have a longer and less enjoyable period, would have to work hard to improve life and provide for new Children.

They came to the final agreement: the name of the race. It was agreed that the Child leader should decide it, but being, basically, a large toddler, spouted an odd word. It sounded to the Adult leader like "heumin". The Adult leader called the new race "humans", and had his best geneticists begin to work on it. Eventually, the new race, immune to the disease, began to thrive on a new world, called Kelm. The humans would later call it Earth.

Sadly, all Adults perished in the disease, and the last Children finally died, unable to continue life without the technology of the Adults. However, humans today still undergo a procedure similar to the ones the ancient Children had to go through - a tediously long and boring education, which is necessary to give them the skills they need to be an Adult.