The Road to Ruin

greg skidmore
The first steps on the descent to perdition are an unkind thought, a hurtful word, rudeness, lies, cruelty and on up the list of everyday sins. We will find hell familiar, it is a most uncivil place, totally lacking in hope and devoid of any kindness. It is like a town hall meeting only eternal.

I've always worried about our lack of manners. I truly believe that it is the path to our ruination. Civil society does not murder each other, it would be rude nor do they practice genocide. Decorum follows both convention and invention. Children are taught manners along with the ABC's. No one need admonish 'be polite' because to act otherwise is unthinkable.

Americans have misconstrued the First Amendment. Freedom of speech is not a license for impudence. The founding fathers may have been revolutionary but never rude.

Today we are encouraged to speak our minds. Children are sanctioned to speak up, question authority and to offer up their embryonic opinions. When the poor teacher can no longer tolerate the disruptive, outspoken child and calls in the parents for conference he is confronted by overprotective bearish boors who lash out with true vitriol in defense of their churlish brats.

I am a person who practices everyday kindness. I also collect many astonished looks. If you are not polite it is impossible to make the next step and advance towards the world of goodwill.

I love the constitution and cherish our Bill of Rights yet sometimes I observe the impertinence of the citizenry and wonder if we are worthy. If we disrespect what we are given how can we legitimately participate in the democratic experiment? We freely gave up many of our rights to the Bush administration out of misplaced fear. Do we secretly desire a sovereign?

We are most quixotic confronting the 'big' problems of the world. Military force is still seen as a viable tool to apply to situations that might better be addressed through polite discussion, decorous diplomacy and conflict resolution. Violence is always an easy solution. Initially it appears to do good (in an eliminating sense), this illusory good is a chimera, the evil it does is permanent and real.

New York City was in the midst of a terrible crime wave during the late 80's and early 90's. Rudy Giuliani brilliantly turned the deplorable state of affairs around by attacking the problem at the grass roots. He cleaned up the streets, collected the trash on time, made sure all subway fares were paid, imposed strict fines for littering and enforced the building codes. He replaced confusion with small signs of decorum and improved the quality of city life.

Good manners in America has historically involved a crushing overlay of rigid culture. Indian schools are a good example. Polite society kidnapped Indian children and forced them to attend schools far away from home and family. The children were stripped of language, culture, clothing and even their braided hair. Assimilation cannot be forced. Successful society must be inclusive, inviting and exciting.

Some of my friends look at our state of affairs and say, "We've always had assholes." In the past these miscreants may have been admonished, confronted or even ostracized but through some cultural glitch or errant progression you may now find that an asshole is your boss, a bigger butt wad runs the company and our congress is rife with preening, self seeking sociopaths.

The reeducation must progress from the top down. We are presently in a situation where adult behavior is corruptive rather than inspirational. Bad example is pervasive today, media and connectivity make it pandemic. Only the slow affection of familiarity and the ardent reinforcement from teachers, leaders and mentors can forge a bend in a learning curve gone errant.

Published by greg skidmore

30 years a professional chef now retired and involved in commentary, creative writing and all things lyrical  View profile

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