The Tear in My Eye is Jesus

Why is it that every time I get in the shower nowadays I find myself crying? I am not sad nor am I upset. I enter the shower in a good mood and leave the shower with the feeling of power flowing through my heart. Not the power of might, but the power of God's glory and that of his message.

Now I am not the type of person you would expect to hear this from. No, this is truly not my place. But now it is the place I find myself in. God is growing inside of me where He has been so dormant for so many years. I always said I believed in Jesus and God, but that's all it was. A distant statement of allegiance that held no water in terms of sincerity. It was no one's fault but mine. I just chose to look the other way, to ignore God and his message. I gave no credence to the sacrifice of our Christ Jesus.

But things are changing for me now. It is not something I have planned to do or planned to happen. God decided it was time for Him to wake up my soul and to soften my heart. He opened my ears so I would be more receptive to his message. The grace of Jesus' life has touched me in a way I cannot even understand.

For myself, I thought I had fallen too far away from Jesus to ever regain favor. I was not an axe murderer or anything like that, but I was spiritually in a coma and on life support. I had made choices in my life that led me further and further from God and the path to righteousness. Quite frankly, my soul had given up hope of commanding my brain and so my life spiraled away from Christ.

The I met a wonderful woman. A patient woman. A woman of God. And i tried my best to cause her to fall from grace as well. But her beautiful soul prevailed and it was She who led me. Her persistence in God and her faith and belief in Jesus and his ways finally permeated my hardened heart. While the Bible tells us that there will be no marriage in heaven and we all be God's children, I know God will let me stay near Her spirit for eternity for my wife has a special place in the Heavens for she returned one of God's fallen children to the light of His grace.

Now I find myself supporting her faith in a powerful way. And times when her faith wavers I remind her of God's word and the rock that is her faith becomes even more solid. We help each other to stay connected with Jesus and it makes our earthly existence as good as we can ask for. We worship our Lord and pay homage to Jesus and his sacrifice. Through God's word and each other's support our house is a God fearing home which would make Jesus proud.

So why am I crying? The Joy should be overwhelming. It is. It is so strong in my soul now that when I hear His word and sing His praise it is hard to hold back my emotion and remain calm. My tears are of joy and relief. Joy in the message of God's salvation and relief that He has chosen me for redemption.

In sports there is a saying, "don't call it a comeback because I was never gone." Well usually some expletives follow that. But for me my salvation is a remarkable comeback. One I could not have made without help. I was gone. I was lost. Thanks to my wife, I am back. I am found. I am never to be alone again for Jesus is my constant companion. He will always watch over me. He will see me sin and repent and in the end when I enter the Kingdom of God, Jesus will be right there and it will be no man hug, we will embrace like I hug my wife, close and warm. In the tear in my eye you will see Jesus' reflection and we will both know I am finally home for good.