The Ten Worst Cover Songs of All-Time

There was once a point in my life when I didn't realize the big deal about cover songs. People complained about newer bands playing songs of older people and they were very angry. I never understood what the big deal was.

Then one day I was watching an Adam Sandler movie called Big Daddy. You know the one with the twins that now have a Disney show. I was on the internet so I was really only half watching and I heard a song that sounded familiar. After listening more closely I thought to myself, "that sort of sounds like Guns N' Roses's Sweet Child 'O Mine except turned into a boring pop song and being song by a woman with a gravely voice, singing out of tune and showing no emotion." Then I realized that is Guns N' Roses's Sweet Child 'O Mine except turned into a boring pop song and being song by a woman with a gravely voice, singing out of tune and showing no emotion.

On that day my eyes were opened. It was like I was seeing a completely different world for the first time. Cover songs are awful. These ten cover songs are the worst.

10. U2's "Paint it Black (Rolling Stones)
My sister is the biggest U2 fan in the world so I know she won't like me saying anything negative about U2 but their cover of Paint it Black is abysmal. I'm not sure how many people have heard it but really it sounds just like you would imagine Bono singing "Paint it Black" and that's why it isn't any good.

9. Michael Bolton's "Sittin' on the Dock" (Otis Redding)
I don't hate Michael Bolton or anything but you can't sing a cover of a classic like this. Unfortunately it is the classics that get cover songs the most but why not take a crappy song and make it better. When is somebody going to cover Vanilla Ice's "Ice, Ice, Baby?" I mean somebody other than Vanilla Ice.

8. Sara Evans' "I Could Not Ask For More" (Edwin McCain)
Wow, the first time I heard Sara Evans' cover of "I Could Not Ask For More" it cured my insomnia. A dead fish flopping around on land has more emotion than Sara Evans does in this song.

7. Uncle Kracker's "Drift Away" (Dobie Gray)
I rank "Drift Away" by Dobie Gray as one of the top five songs of all-time. It's bad enough that anybody made a cover of it but Uncle Kracker? This is who decides to take a crack at it? Uncle Kracker?

6. Madonna's "American Pie" (Don Mclean)
I admit that Madonna is at least a bigger name than Uncle Kracker so she gets a little bit more leeway when it comes to making bad covers, but not for "American Pie." "American Pie" is an even bigger classic than "Drift Away."

5. Smashmouth's "I'm a Believer" (The Monkees)
The saddest thing about Smashmouth making a cover of "I'm a Believer" is that it sounds just like their other songs. So when their cover of "I'm a Believer" song comes on I actually mistake it for that lame "All Star" song. The Monkees deserve better than this!

4. Jessica Simpson's "These Boots Were Made for Walkin'" (Nancy Sinatra)
I'll give Jessica Simpson this much, she's consistent. Jessica Simpson accurately portrays Nancy Sinatra about as poorly as she portrayed Daisy Duke.

3. Britney Spears' "Satisfaction" (Rolling Stones)
When Britney Spears sang her cover of "Satisfaction" at the 2000 MTV Awards she tried to confuse everybody into liking it by taking her clothes off during the performance. It didn't work though, we know it's crap.

2. Sheryl Crow's "Sweet Child 'O Mine" (Guns N' Roses)
Sheryl Crow's cover of "Sweet Child 'O Mine" ranks very high on my list simply because it was the first cover that made me realize, "you know, cover songs really suck." But I guess to be fair Guns N' Roses has done a few cover songs themselves. Maybe this was secretly Sheryl Crow's way of punishing them.

1. Rascal Flatts' "Life is a Highway" (Tom Cochrane)
"Life is a Highway" might not be a classic like "American Pie" or "Drift Away" but it's a personal favorite of mine. Tom Cochrane's version makes you feel like you're in your car driving at 110 mph with the windows rolled down and the wind blowing in your face. Rascal Flatts' cover makes you feel like it's 110 degrees out and you're stuck in a broken down pick-up truck that has no air conditioner and the guy next to you is the biggest redneck on the face of the earth...and he weighs 300 pounds...and is sweating like a pig... Really the song, and that scenario, just make me want to curl up and die.