The Terrible Toos: Sex and the City 2 is Too Long, Too Over-the-Top, Just Too Much

Like millions of other Sex and the City fans, when I heard that there was going to be a sequel to the 2008 movie, I was ecstatic. When the release date was revealed, I marked my calendar. When the trailer premiered online, I sent the link to all of my friends via email, Facebook and Twitter. And when Fandango started pre-selling tickets, I placed my order (making sure I googled the nearest theatre because I was going to be out of town that weekend).

Finally the time comes, and I am sitting in the theatre popcorn and drink in hand. The movie starts. And I'm watching. And watching. And watching. And as I am watching, I am so confused. What happened to smart, funny writing that I had fallen in love with years ago? What happened to the smart, funny women that I loved? What happened????

Sex and the City 2 picks up two years after we last saw the ladies. Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker) and Mr. Big aka John James Preston (Chris Noth) are married and sharing their life together in a down sized, yet still opulent, apartment in Manhattan. Carrie is about to release her latest book, a memoir on marriage. Charlotte York Goldenblatt (Kristen Davis) is experiencing the pains of motherhood as her youngest is going through the terrible twos. Miranda Hobbes (Cynthia Nixon) has repaired her marriage and is experiencing troubles are work. Lastly, Samantha Jones (Kim Catrall) is back in New York and back to her sexy, single life.

So what goes wrong? Well, there is no real plot to the film. It starts with a wedding. Then they return to the city. Then they go overseas (and they stay there for two thirds of the movie). There is a fall, a kiss, an arrest, some karaoke, and an implausible over the top political tirade. And then they return to New York City. That's pretty much the movie in a nutshell. No surprises, pivotal turns, and absolutely no character growth.

When the women aren't lavishing in the excess of their $22,000 a night hotel, complete with personal assistant and private cars for each woman, they are complaining about their picture perfect lives. As a long-time Sex and the City fan, it seems that the women have reverted back to their season one selves. Carrie is lamenting over the fact that her once commitment phobic husband only wants to stay home and order take-out. She would much rather be out and about. And Charlotte is stressed and paranoid that her husband may have an affair with the hot Irish nanny. Samantha is simply used as a catalyst to get the ladies out of the country and the source on many menopause one liners. Miranda is perhaps the most evolved, finally putting family above her career, but once that happens, she too is reduced to cheesy one-liners ("Abu Dhabi Doooo!" Being my favorite).

The good? There is fabulous fashion, beautiful scenic shots of Morocco (which passes for Abu Dhabi in the film), and beautiful Middle Eastern men. Also, an entertaining performance of Beyonce's monster hit Single Ladies by none other than Liza Minnelli. The performance takes place at the wedding of Carrie and Charlottes gay BFFs Stanford and Anthony. The over-the-top wedding includes an all male choir, swans, and Carrie serving as best man.

Overall the film is way too long. The last thirty minutes were pointless excess. It seems that the film makers spent so much time and money on the over-the-top opulence, that they neglected the story and the characters. Sex and the City 2 joins the dozens of sequels that fall into the Terrible Two category.