The Therapy of Writing

I am 52 years old and soon to be 53, thank God. Over the years I have had my rough times as many do. My childhood was not very pleasant due to an alcoholic father who became mean when he drank. After he was out of our lives for the time being I walked right into a bad marriage.

I am one that really gets tired of those who are victimized and learn to thrive on it and blame all their problems in live on their past. I understand there are things you can not always deal with so I am not trying to make this just black and white. I am only discussing my cases in life.

After my marriage broke up and I was a single mother with two children trying to make it without child support. I came close to reaching my end. I even tried suicide which thank God I did not succeed. That will be another story.

I finally decided to start counseling which took two or three years. I grew up a lot in that time. It opened my eyes and made me realize what I had to do to better my life. I had to stop dwelling on the past which is an easy rut to get into. I had to quit blaming my past and move on with life. Move on with the the two beautiful children I had to keep me going.

I used to dread getting old until I realized how precious life was. I watched my mother die of cancer at the age of 48 when she had dreams of retiring and getting old.

I also found my father later in life. He quit drinking and smoking and I was blessed with a period in my life of actually having my father which was another story I had written.

I have raised two children who have both become successful and made me very proud. I watched my second husband suffer with a terminal brain cancer and then be killed in an accident. Plus I have my own health issues which could always be much worse so I am fortunate. I have a friend at this time dealing with cancer and I am trying to be there as much as possible. We plan to beat this.

I've written stories on many of these subjects and other incidents in my life. I've always been a writer whether good or not. When I went to counseling I was always told to write it out to get it out of my system. When angry with someone, write them a letter and then destroy it. Of course, there are times you need to confront people but it is always best to do so when not angry.

I've made many friends on AC and appreciate so much that they take the time to read my work and comment. Just know that when I am sad and write it, by the time you read it I am fine.

I've dealt with cancer in my life through family and friends. I can only imagine what they are feeling but I've always read it in their eyes. So I wrote a poem about it and some of you thought I had cancer. Thankfully I am blessed at this time not to. I just wanted to tell cancer what I thought.

I love writing and sharing my stories and then there are times it is just my therapy. A way to get my hurt or fears out. Over the years I have grown to understand what is important in life. Life is full of ups and downs for everyone. There are times when something is just not important enough to argue about. There are more important things to appreciate. As my mother always said, there is always someone worse off.