The Toy Dilemma: To Buy or Not to Buy

As soon as I step foot into my house, chances are I am stepping on a toy. It could be anything from a stuffed puppy dog which, when barefoot, is kind of a welcome feeling. But then there are those times when you get the toy car, and you bite your tongue to suppress the string of profanities you want to unleash on that tiny piece of metal.

I know I am not alone as a mother in this world. Millions of parents mean millions of babies, and that probably means billions of toys scattered throughout the house. How much is too much, though? While a mother's joy comes from her tot finally picking up that $30 train set, a child seems almost more content with the box. That is, until you take that toy away. And then it seems the underworld has come up to stay.

During my pregnancy I was inundated with small, cute outfits and my son, despite never picking up a taste for them, has about ninety different pacifiers. But the whole time I was worrying, "Is he going to have enough toys?!?" Big mistake. For the first half of his life, nothing was more fun to play with than mommy's hair. It was fun to chew, pull, rip out and chew. As I sat in a living room full of colorful blocks and soft and squishy animals, I felt as if maybe we are focusing on the wrong aspects of childhood.

Ask anyone what their favorite childhood toy was, and you will most likely be met with a quick, definite answer and a suddenly overly emotional friend. For me, it was my little stuffed baby doll. But I cannot for the life of me remember one other toy I had as a child. What I do remember were the places my family went, the day trips, the weekend trips... and the worst were the 12 hour drive trips!

When did childhood become materialistic? My small corner of the family room has a giant stuffed teddy bear sitting next to a giant bucket of toys. And even though my son has every option in the world of things to play with, he chooses me. I see, time and time again, a parent walking through the store, dreading the few seconds it takes to sprint past the toy aisles. Without fail it will result in a tearful child who swears their parent is the worst in the world because they can't get a toy on that visit. And I am guilty of the same as all of us, wondering just why can't that child have their toy? Especially if it makes them stop crying.

But I feel as if placating our children with physical objects instead of taking the time to make memories has become the rule, rather than the exception. A child's sense of self will not be determined if he or she doesn't get the newest, biggest, most animated toy out there. They are molded by our actions alone. A child does what it sees.

So, next time I am in a store, and the easiest thing to do is to grab whatever is the shiniest thing and give it to my son, I will instead pick him up and let him pick out a vegetable for dinner. Maybe then he will grow up knowing that the most important thing in life is his family and love, not objects and money.