The Truth Comes Out

The reasons I came here
were so cut and clear.
I wanted to bond
a relationship of fear.
You were the dad
I never did know.
We weren't given the chance
to let our love grow.
For all those years
the drugs were to blame.
Now is our time
to re-light the flame.
I wanted my kids
to know who you were;
But much of their memories
will mirror mine I am sure.
So hard I've tried
to take care of you;
But 'm shoved to the side
and walk away blue.
I feel like a kid
just staying away.
Wondering If I
should be here today.
My son thinks you hate him
and you don't try to fix it.
Others get that attention.
Oh dad, I love you so much
and I know you are sick.
If only I could heal you
if only our lives we could pick.
I don't want to leave you
but it's so hard to stay.
To watch you get sicker
with each passing day.
It's really not good for you
to stay locked in your room.
I feel I'm at fault
somehow causing your doom.
Aunt patsy is everything
in your eyes right now.
You always said if I were here
you'd trust me with your wishes.
Now I am here with no right,
to say what will happen when it's time
for your glorious flight.
So now I feel
I've been left in the dark.
Sitting cold and alone
like a bench in the park.
In my mind
we've made our amends.
I only wish
we could have always been friends.
I guess it is all
part of God's plan.
It's the one we were dealt
no matter how played the hand.