The Ultimate Guide to GOWF (Going Out While Fat)

First and foremost let's be reasonable. Men generally prefer a woman who is not fat. This includes all of you ladies who would otherwise describe yourselves as: voluptuous, curvy, thick, full-figured, plus-size, and big boned. I have to put my disclaimer out there, not ALL men prefer slim women, however, you aren't as desirable to "cream of the crop" types of men if you are indeed obese. Some men might find us attractive behind closed doors, but most of the time, we end up either the honey under the sheets or with a fat guy. If you are like me, you might like guys who aren't fat or have that teddy bear quality. I prefer slim guys. Hey, lots of slim girls date and even marry our chubby counterparts, but if we happen to marry a slim guy, he might spend most of his time trying to get us to lose the weight. Now, if you find yourself in this category and you plan on patronizing any kind of bar or night club, or lounge (not including those only catering to big women or places that are predominantly Black) these are the guidelines you should follow.

1. Keep the size of the group of women you go out with small. Don't go with a bunch of girls, you will get lost in the shuffle.

2. Never go out with a woman of the same race. Doesn't matter what she looks like, if she is thinner than you, she will get more attention and "play". It's that simple. If she happens to be cuter than you in the face AND thinner than you, well you can just forget about getting any attention from the opposite sex when you are in her company. See, men a clubs/bars tend to put women in categories based on their race while on the prowl. If they see two women together, and they are BOTH black or of the same race they will categorize them as "two black girls or those two asian girls" . He then will proceed to pick the most attractive of the two. The thin one will get picked hands down (unless he is a chubby chaser). Try to go out with a girlfriend who is of a different race. Think about it. If you are Asian and thick and she is Black and thin..you WILL NOT attract the same kind of man. Therefore, there is no competition and if no man asks you to dance well, you can't blame it on that. :)

3. Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative. Please dress for your size. Wear things that will bring out your best features but don't embarrass yourself. PLEASE. You make it worse for the rest of us big girls.

4. Get used to men not buying you drinks. In all the years of my singlehood, while I have gone out to many bars and clubs and at different weights in my life, a man has NEVER EVER EVER bought me a drink. EVER. While my skinny friends can just walk up to the bar and instantly get offered drinks from guys. Why? My ending thoughts are this: They really hate fat girls don't they? It's hard enough to be single, but God Bless you if you happen to be obese and single. Even if you are attractive, smart, funny and just plain nice. You will still get overlooked until you do what you have to do. In order to avoid those feelings of rejection every time you do happen to go out, well, losing weight would probably be a good decision. Ugghhhh.

5. Be prepared, you will never get discounts on your car insurance, or on anything else for that matter. Hot people have instant access to bargaining power!

6. Stop refering to yourself as a BBW (big beautiful woman) if you know damn well that you are not. Just because you are fat, doesn't mean you get to automatically refer yourself as a BBW.

7. And finally, don't wallow your sorrows in drugs and alcohol and other dumb things like that. There is nothing uglier than a big girl in a drunken stupor in public. Wait until you get home.

Okay, you are right, being fat doesn't mean you are a total reject or that you should feel bad about yourself. But, let's be real, it's just not healthy. I know it, you know it. No matter what anyone says, you cannot convince me that you are fat and healthy. I know some people think Beyonce is fat; these people clearly have problems. But, I am talking about realistically. If you are obese, you know it (unless you have an eating disorder or mental issues) In general, being thinner (not skinny!!) makes life a little bit easier. But, this guide should be able to help you out in the meantime.