The Unemployed Recession Ridden Blues

It's amazing how not having a job can make you feel like you can't stop moving while simultaneously making you feel as if you're not going anywhere at all.

Any idle moment seems like you're letting the world down; surely a job has slipped through your fingers because you decided to watch that one television program. Time spent not looking for a job seems like time wasted, even though you know you can't realistically look for a job 24/7. So in this way life seems to not only be in perpetual motion, but that it has to. Keep moving or validate the reason why no one wants you to work for them.

But at the same time there's the distinct feeling of being completely immobile. That the world is passing you by, including all of your dreams and aspirations. You watch others pursue careers and go places you only see through Facebook albums. Your life seems stuck in neutral or worse, in reverse, and time is a frictionless slope where you find no grip. No foothold. Only the sense of slipping slowly toward a fate you thought you'd never have.

There's hope, at least for a time. You know in your heart that you're not as worthless as the world can make you feel. Everybody reminds you that there's a recession and therefore a reason why jobs are so hard to come by. Reassurances can cover a wound but they can't hide the ugly truth, so eventually you realize that assurances are merely hollow gestures. In the end, hope won't get you a job.

So the pressure mounts, and the walls draw near. People you turn to for comfort become people that cause you to remember your shame. Letting yourself down is letting them down, and knowing that they know makes it worse. Love is your only refuge but even love feels the strain created by having no job, no money, and no certain future.

But in the end you are moving with the world, and time doesn't wait for you to see the light. The only way to persevere is to see each day through and follow-up on every opportunity available. Remember: an employer doesn't want to hire a depressed slouch who can't find the silver lining. At least that's what you tell yourself before trudging through each sleepless night.