The Wives and Children Inmates Leave Behind
Prison Without Walls
Women who remain married to inmates are seldom understood. In a society where the divorce rate is at about 50%, those women who choose to honor their vows are looked upon as freaks of nature. Those who choose to stay faithful and see things through bewilder those who cannot possibly understand. If your brother was in prison, would you still talk to him? Would he still be your brother? It's the same thing. We cannot change people, only our perceptions of people.
For those who choose to stay married to inmates, especially those with children, life is beyond difficult. She is left being both mother and father to their children, the bread-winning is left totally up to her, and she does it all without family or friends, usually, because they are just as confused as everyone else about why she is with that man. There are hundreds of thousands of prison ministries, but who ministers to the technically single mom whose spouse is in the very prison they are ministering in? Who is there to help them? Sure they may be able to get on government assistance, but what if they want better for their kids than that?
I am one of these women. I have looked for years and years to find a program that would not only offer support for women who have spouses in prison, but also be a support group, a sounding board, and a community of women (even if they just have kids whose dad is in prison) who understand each other and can help one another. I have found none. So, I am starting my own. It is called Prison Without Walls. http://prisonwithoutwalls.yolasite.com/ I call it that because we are locked up right along with them.
Come by and have a look. See what we are about. We are in the beginning stages. And if you feel led, we are a non profit organization and we do accept donations to keep this program going. And if you are a woman in this same position, we welcome you without judgment and with open arms.
Published by Cheryl Engelke
Cheryl is a happily married mother of two beautiful girls. She is a full time writer and loves time with her family, music, theater, movies, writing, reading, and animals. View profile
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5 Comments
Post a Commentjasmin, you are not alone I'm one of those woman that has a husband in prison for a very long time. My heart goes out to you because you have a small child to care for I only have myself, My sons are older. I'm glad that I found this web sight. We are very misunderstood my family and friends. I've been by myself for four years this coming March. My love for my husband is very thin sometime when I visit him I ask myself will this be the day that I tell him that I don't want to be in this marriage. I know that the time is coming for me to tell him, its just how do you tell the man that you vow the love til dealth do you part. My advise to you jasmin if In your heart you feel that you have done all you can and pray, ask God for help. Think about your child and the life that you can give her without pressure and stress. Take time and get to know who you are and what you want fine away to be comfortable in your own skin.
i like wat ur doing is very needed cuz its hard. i actually have my baby father in jail wit murder charges and is the hardest thing ever because you know his not coming out no time soon. i love him so much but he doesnt appreciate what i do for him a go visit all the time i help him im there for him but he never appreciate my love for him. he calls with attitudes and arguin with me out of no where he blames me for whats happening to him he doesnt think bout my son when he starts to say that he going to take his life if i leave him. but i cannot deal with it nomore our relationship has been very rough always insultin me pushing me the jelouse was extreme but i was always there for him but now i gotta think bout me and my son. its not bout him all the time u know. but the thing is should i feel bad bout leavin him not wantin him nomore? im still gonna visit and help him but as the mother of his son not as his gurlfriend. i need help.
Thanks for sharing. :)
I am PROUD of you girl. Go for, have FAITH and you will SUCCEED.
I have never thought about that, but good for you for starting something that is obviously needed!