The Worst On-Screen Couples. Ever
Seriously. Ever
10. Harrison Ford and Kate Capshaw, "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom." The only legitimate moment of on-screen emotion between them came when Kate Capshaw spat on Harrison Ford. (Note to Steven Spielberg: don't cast your girlfriend. Ever.)
9. Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez, "Gigli." I'm not sure which is more unbelievable: Ben Affleck's awful "Brooklyn" accent, or the way J-Lo's lesbian character suddenly decides to capitulate...you know, the way all lesbians just decide to start hitting from the other side of the plate.
8. Sylvester Stallone and Sharon Stone, "The Specialist." This scene would have been more believable if either one of them had had a mirror instead of the other person, because putting two narcissists on the floor of a shower was just wrong.
7. Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston, "The Breakup." Here's a hint: if they are already dating off-screen, do not cast them as a couple on-screen.
6. Vince Vaughn and Isla Fisher, "The Wedding Crashers." Here's another hint: stop casting Vince Vaughn as a romantic lead. Just stop it. Make him run a few laps and lay off the buffet line at the very least, because he's swelling up like a toad.
5. Jake Gyllenhall and Heath Ledger, "Brokeback Mountain." This may come as a complete shock to anyone not living in New York City, but surprise! Cowboys don't spontaneously become gay. NOBODY spontaneously becomes gay. Gaaaaah...
4. Christian Bale and Maggie Gyllenhall, "The Dark Knight." When Heath Ledger's Joker tossed Gyllenhall's character off the roof, Bale should have let her go.
3. Jason Statham and Qi Shu, "The Transporter." She could NOT have been more annoying, not if she'd worn a tin-foil pyramid on her head and said her lines through a megaphone for the entire film.
2. Hugh Grant and Anyone - The Geneva Convention would ban the showing of his films to war criminals for being cruel and unusual. Enough!
1. Deborah Gibson and Vic Chao, "Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus." Iann Robinson of Crave Online said it better than I could have: "The entire time I watched Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus all I could think of was 'This was the best take, this was the keeper'."
Main source: The Internet Movie Database
Published by Van Walker - Featured Contributor in Sports
Just your average 2.03 meter carbon-based life-form, Van has a virtually useless Master's Degree in English Literature and a well-worn Fender Stratocaster. He currently teaches English at a Korean university... View profile
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