Things Children Say

Five year old Joey wanted to play with his PS2 system, but he didn't know where he put his controller. He wanted his mom to find the controller for him. This time mom said no. She told Joey that he had to find it himself. Instead of looking for the item; Joey threw the biggest tantrum. He yelled and cried and threw toys around for more than thirty minutes. Mom ignored his tantrum and went outside to work in the yard. Finally, Joey settled down and went outside, wiping tears from his face. Joey looked at his mother and said, "Mom, we have to talk."

One day grandma and her eight year old grandchild were watching a TV commercial. "Grandma do you use that kind of foaming bath oil?" the child asked. Grandma answered, "No, since I had hip replacement surgery four years ago, I don't take baths, I only take showers." The next day the Avon sales lady came to deliver an order. She was showing grandma the new line of bath products. The grandchild looked at the Avon sales lady and said; "Grandma doesn't need that stuff, she hasn't had a bath for four years."

Janet took her two young boys to visit their great grandmother. For medical reasons; Granny had previously had all of her teeth pulled. On this particular day she wasn't wearing her dentures. The three year old kept staring at his great grandmother. He couldn't hold it back any longer. He said "Granny, my baby brother is seven months old. He already started getting his teeth. When are you going to start getting yours?"

Mrs. Smith was having problems getting child support money from her Ex. husband. She wasn't always careful of what she said in front of her four year old daughter. One Sunday morning, Mrs. Smith was sitting with her daughter in her usual seat in church; the front row; right in front of the minister. She was wearing her wide rim hat and clapping and singing along with the choir. The four year old stood up on the bench, facing the rear. Suddenly the child yelled out in a very loud voice, "Look , mom, there's that no good, trifling, bum!" The entire church became very quiet and all eyes turned to stare. There standing in the doorway was Mrs. Smith Ex. husband.

Susan put ten dollars in the brown envelope, sealed it and handed it to her six year old daughter and told her to give it to her teacher. The child asked, "what is it for?" "It's to help feed the poor children," Susan answered. The child asked "am I a poor kid or a rich kid?" "You're a poor kid," the mother replied. Later that day, Susan drove to the elementary school to pick up her daughter. The child came to the car with ice cream and a soft drink in her hands. "Where did you get money to buy that stuff? Did you eat lunch today?" the mother asked. "Oh, yes, answered the child. I used the money from the envelope. You said it was for poor children, and you said I am poor. My friends said they are poor, so I used the money to feed us."

Six year old Todd was inside the dinning room, standing at the slide door staring at his Rott-weiler. The Rott-weiler sat on the grass in the back yard staring back at Todd. Todd became freaked out when the huge dog got up and walked toward the door. Todd took a couple steps backwards and said to the dog. "Back off! I'll jack you up!

Five year old Amy was playing in the back yard. The old man from next door; held onto his walking cane with one hand and watered the lawn with his other hand. Amy said, "hello, Mr. Jones, today is my birthday." Mr. Jones smiled, "happy birthday Amy, how old are you?" Amy replied, "I'm five years old. How old are you Mr. Jones?" Mr. Jones proudly answered, "I'm ninety four years old." "WOW! how did you get so old?" Amy asked. "Well, I just kept getting up every morning." answered Mr. Jones. Amy hesitated, then she said, "Mr. Jones, maybe you shouldn't have gotten up every morning. You should have skipped some of them."