Things to Do when Your Husband is Always Busy with Paperwork

The day is almost done, the children are finished with their soccer game, or the guitar lesson. You're done with the chores. You just want some bonding moment with your husband. He sits in front of the TV and tries to catch up with whatever is on the sports channel. Before the first commercial gap is on, you could hear him snoring. You let him rest for a while, and hush the children who are actually supposed to be off to be bed in a few minutes.

Grey's Anatomy is on very soon. Or you have been waiting to tell him about how your day went. You tuck the kids to bed and kiss them goodnight. You could hear your hubby fixing himself something to eat. Now, you can invite him to watch with you, or have a little chitchat. Then he tells you that he should start with his lesson plan, and has promised a class that he would return yesterday's test papers.

This is a common scenario if you have a husband who is a high school teacher. He brings home heavy books, tons of papers and piles of students' notebooks. He needs to prepare the lesson plan for tomorrow, yet he is dead tired he needs to take a nap before he starts his nightly routine. By the time he is all set to work, you are annoyed and have given up hope that he would spend some fun time with you before you sleep ahead.

So, before you get really pissed off and start war, here are a few tips for you to manage this common issue:

1. If you're bringing the kids to a soccer game, a play rehearsal, a taekwondo glass, or music lesson, make sure you steal this time to be together. A 30-minute activity for the kids would be enough time for you to get coffee from Starbucks, or an ice cream cone or anything that you would fancy at the moment. While you sip and drive, or eat, you could catch up with how each other's day went.

Although you could bring up serious concerns about a bill that has been unpaid, or a broken pipe that needs to be repaired, try to use this time just for light and relaxing talk. Make sure you spend the time laughing about simple things that you would want to share with each other.

2. If you can bear it, sit with him while he watches the sports channels. You might also be interested in basketball or tennis or football. That means you can enjoy his shows and be together while he relaxes in front of the TV. If you do not really have an clue what touchdown, love set or goal tending really mean, then try to sit with him and perhaps ask him during breaks. If you cannot really stand it, at least stay near him. You can read a book, do your cross-stitching, or your scrapbook activity. At least you're in the same room. You could start a quick conversation once in a while or could even cuddle for a few minutes every time you feel like doing it. Just take note, men do not want conversations while the game is going on.

3. Bargain with him. If you feel like you would enjoy watching Grey's Anatomy when he watches it too, tell him so. Tell him to start working before 9pm and have a break once the show is on. Then he could go and bury his nose under those papers once the show is over. Try to bribe him as well, by telling him that you would give him a back rub if he watches with you.

4. Try to be involved in his other interests. If he wants to jog during weekdays to relax, join him. If you cannot run, then just walk while he runs. If he wants biking, then try it as well. If you don't want to bike, run while he bikes. The important thing is you are next to each other even if you are not doing the exact same thing.

It is really frustrating sometimes when your husband brings home a lot of work. Others might be luckier because their spouses do not need to bring office work at home anymore. But this is your husband's bread and butter, so you really cannot complain. You just have to be patient and creative in finding ways to find bonding moments and fun time with him. Just don't let the romance die in your relationship. Do the sweet, little things that you are so used to doing. Like joking around and sitting on his lap when he is about to start with his lesson plan. Give him a bear hug when he least expects it. Share a mug of coffee with him. It's the little things that count anyway.