Things Men Do to Ruin Their Relationships

Maintaining a long term relationship can be fun, but it definitely requires a lot of effort - the right kind of effort. Our daily lives are unpredictable, and in order to not be caught off guard, we have to make the right decisions in a specified amount of time, in the correct context. A relationship is no different. So, what can you do to make sure you screwed yourself over and lost the girl of your dreams?

You cheated.

Oh yea, this is the biggie. This stems from a moral problem. No matter how attractive another girl is, or how much she cries on your shoulder, begging for your sympathy, know that you have someone at home waiting for you. Women treat cheating as something huge, as they know men are more likely to be less faithful because of our predispositions to physical attraction. Keep it in your pants, and know that you actually have someone at home who really cares about you, someone who will be there for you after you're old and withered, unlike this girl who just ran up off the street.

You suck at finances.

She may think twice about staying with you the time she sees how you spend money - and rightfully so. In order to keep any family going, the breadwinners must provide enough money to put food on the table, a roof over the head, and lights and water in the house. If you're the type of guy who lives paycheck to paycheck and spends money on things that you don't need even though you're hurting for food, chances are, the woman is sure to leave you in 3....2.....1 - yea she's gone.

Even though you two may have an attraction to each other, personal finances are something that must be treated with seriousness. Money may not be everything, but it affords people the financial freedom they need to do whatever they want to do, whether it be to save for retirement or buy a new house. And if you're buying up Air Jordan's like Nike is going out of business tomorrow, no woman can take that kind of punishment.

If you're working on your spending habits, then she will see that you're trying hard to improve. Being in a relationship is being able to stay together and work through each others' faults to help improve the bond, as well as yourselves.

You treat her like trash.

Ok, so now that you've been together for some time, you begin to slowly incorporate her into your daily life, and...what? You're taking her for granted? Many women leave relationships because they feel that their significant other has changed, well, significantly, since the beginning. In the beginning, you were buying her flowers, writing her notes, and you couldn't stop thinking about her. Now, you'd rather spend time to hang out and play football than take her out to a nice lunch on your anniversary.

Men tend to do this, because they feel that they have a sense of security by leaving their woman in the background to their lives, only making her available when they are in need. Well, what if the situation was reversed? The truth is, only when a man is insecure does he take a woman for granted and take advantage of her feelings.

You grovel at her feet.

Likewise, only when a man is insecure does he constantly annoy and chase after a woman who needs her own private space. Men do this because they feel that they are 1) afraid to lose their woman to another man, or 2) they are extra insecure in their abilities to maintain a relationship.

Women hate it when you are overly aggressive in giving them too much attention - they need some time alone. Heck, everyone needs some time alone. In the first few weeks of the relationship, maybe you wanted to impress her or woo her, but after a while it gets annoying. Everyone has his or her own life to live, so leave her alone once in a while. You don't need to be calling her every 2 seconds to be professing your love. If you truly care about her, there are other ways to show it. No need to overstep your boundaries.

You lock her up at home.

Shackles and everything. Have you ever heard that quote "If you really love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then it is yours forever?"

No matter how much you want to control who a woman gets to interact with and who she gets to see, she's going to do it no matter what. If you just worry about maintaining a good relationship, what reason does she have to leave? Instead, you decide to explicitly state who she can and can't see, when she gets to go out, what she is allowed to do - you only make yourself look like a jerk. Also, the more you exhibit this kind of behavior, the more she is likely to be driven farther and farther away from you.

If a woman has decided to leave a relationship, then no matter how controlling you are, she's going to leave. Period. It's no use worrying about something you can control. Even so, it's not a bad idea to show your concern when she starts to hang around "this one guy" too much. It shows that you care about the relationship, and she will think twice next time she goes to meet him at the coffee shop.

You suck at parenting.

So, you have kids now? Make sure they are the focal point of your family. A lot of women have a kid with a man, and then they realize that he isn't fit to be a father at all. Men have to understand that once you have a child, the nights of long partying and going out with the boys has to stop. You have another life to be responsible for, so take care of it. Otherwise, don't have the child until you're ready.

Providing nothing but money isn't going to cut it either. Raising a child takes a lot of time, effort, and planning. Each moment in a child's life is extremely vital to his or her later years, as laying the foundation is the most important part when doing anything. If you are so narrow minded as to think that a woman can take care of the children while you go out to work, sorry to break it to you but the 17th century is over.

Sometimes, it's hard to tell why a relationship didn't work out the way it was supposed to. Even so, there are times when it is blatantly and painfully obvious as to why it didn't work. Make sure that you take into account each of these things mentioned before you rush into a relationship and decide to hurt someone else.