Thinking About Transracial Adoption?

You're thinking about adopting a child from a race other than your own?

That's great! Its not something everybody is comfortable doing and it should be considered carefully and thoughtfully before making a decision. If you've been contemplating it, take some time and examine the following thoughts.

· In your heart, are you comfortable doing this? If there is a chance you going to regret it, keep thinking about it before you do it. Spend time examining your own beliefs about race and ethnicity.

· If you have any racists in your family, now would be a good time to have a talk with them. You may not be able to change their mind, but setting up boundaries may save embarrassment later on.

· Do you live in a community made up of members of your own race? If so, how will your child be treated? How will you feel about your child, this person who is now part of your family, if others treat him/her different because of their skin color?

· What do you know about their biological culture? Is it enough to answer questions they may have throughout their childhood?

· If you're the only one who has adopted transracially within your circle or community, you may become its "spokesperson" without wanting to. Are you prepared to discuss and dispel racial stereotypes with your child, your family and your community?

· Remember, your child will not be the only one who is different within the family....so will you.

· Your family dynamics will forever change and you will become a racially mixed family, not a "Caucasian family with a Asian (or African) child". Remember, your child will not be the only one who is different within the family....so will you.

· There are people and organizations that are against transracial adoptions? Spend a little time finding out why they feel that way so you can reasonably debate why you're for it, if you're ever put into that situation.

· Do you already have other children? How will they feel about being part of a racially mixed family? Have they ever had interactions with that race before? Over time, they'll fall into a normal sibling relationship, but in the beginning they'll need you to help them find their way.

· Are you prepared to be asked intrusive questions and be given unsolicited advice? Most people are curious and ask questions and that's great because it gets people thinking. There are also those that will ask questions of a personal nature. Be prepared for that.

· As they get older will you be able to discuss racism with them and really hear what they have to say, even if it's against your own race?

As you start considering and answering these questions to yourself, you'll find that it'll bring up more questions and things to think about. That's good!
By doing that you'll know if this is something that's right for you and your family.

Joanne is part of a multiracial family of five, formed through adoption. She created Forever Parents, an online community for adoptive parents in 2002 and has recently expanded it to include an adoption blog and an online store of adoption products and gifts.