Thinking Well to Feel Well

Can you remember a time when you just felt sad, or angry, or maybe hopeless? Maybe you are feeling that way now. I have frequently taken my turn in the emotional dumps. However, I have also learned there is something I can do about them. The Bible directs us "...whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things." Philippians 4:8 KJV The science of psychology has discovered why such a plan can be effective in changing our feelings.

Thoughts influence feelings

Cognitive (thinking) therapy is based on the idea that our thoughts affect our feelings. A simple way to understand this concept is to imagine a set of hanging scales like the scales of justice symbol or picture at left. Think of one side representing all the negative thoughts you have- fears, worries, doubts, anger, hatreds, sad events, past hurts etc. On the other side of the scale would go all the positive thoughts about you and your life - happy memories, confidence, peace, healthy passions, things about people or situations you love etc. Our mood is basically the result of the balance between the two sides. If we spend all our time thinking of all the things wrong or bad in our lives, that side of the scale becomes heavier and our mood will fall into sadness / depression, worry / anxiety, or some other negative emotion. On the other hand, if we focus on all the things that are good or well in our life (our blessings), our mood scale tips in the positive direction toward more peace, confidence, joy, passion, and purpose.

We can choose our thoughts and gain power over our feelings

Here is the secret power God has given us to influence our moods. We can make a deliberate choice about which side of our life we focus on. We have the power to choose our thoughts. When we regularly choose to focus on positive thoughts (thinking well) we add weight to the positive side of our mood scale and usually end up feeling well, or at least significantly better. If we choose to focus on the dark side of everything the mountain of "terribleness" that builds up will nearly always result in a bad mood eventually. But the beauty is, we can choose! We are not helpless creatures whose emotions are held hostage by the every changing whim of circumstances. We can make a deliberate conscious choice to do something that has a very good chance making us much happier! I believe this is referred to in the Bible as "taking every thought captive" - we take negative thoughts captive by deliberately choosing to focus on the positives / blessings in our lives.

Only negative feelings are realistic, right?

There are those who discount the idea of generally focusing on the positive as being unrealistic, flaky or just uninformed. Here are two responses. First, if you CAN genuinely feel better, why would you choose not to? Our feelings are real even though they often do not give us an accurate picture of reality. But it is reality that we can choose to do things that will influence us to feel better or worse. Do you just want to feel worse?

For those who insist on believing that only pessimists truly understand reality, think of it this way. Remember one of those bad times. Now try to remember the exact, at the moment, circumstances. Chances are, you, like me, had plenty to eat, a place to sleep, and were not in any real danger of being killed or tortured. In other words, you were OK, you just didn't feel OK. So the truth is, you believed your feeling of "not being OK" or "feeling bad" over the objective facts that you were in reality OK! If you in fact are not in some terrible pain and not going to die in the near future, aren't you basically OK? For Christians the true picture gets even better. We are constantly and continually loved so passionately God himself through Christ died for us. We have an eternal future so bright we simply cannot describe it. And God has promised to assist us in this life if we just ask and willingly follow His leading. How can that possibly be a terrible life?

Do this to change your feelings

Next time you are feeling down, angry, overwhelmed or just plain bad, make a deliberate choice to find the good still left in your life. Focus on that. Repeat it. Write it down. Tell it to others. Thank God and others who have added the good to your life and keep repeating it. Keep doing anything that helps you focus on the good things in your life until the scale of your emotions tips toward happiness and you start to see the truth in your heart. You are in imperfect but not entirely bad circumstances. You can heavily influence your feelings for the better. With practice, thinking well, you will very likely feel well! To which side of your scale will you add?