Time to Have Another Baby? How Do You Know

Time to have another baby. I don't know how to answer this question. To me this is a harder decision that making the first decision to have our first baby. When my husband and were married I knew right away I wanted a baby. My husband agreed and we started the trying process. I call it the trying process because little did we know how long and how hard is was going to be. After almost 3 years of trying on and off we ended up seeing a fertility specialist who suggested Invitro Fertilization. Long story short, we now have a beautiful baby boy who just turned two years old. This is why my question that I mentioned earlier of when to have baby number two is so difficult. The process of Invitro Fertilization is an extremely long and very difficult process. It takes months and tons of procedures, blood work, sonos, etc...for it to be effective. We unfortunately suffered a twin miscarriage that almost broke my heart. After healing from that pain we went ahead with the process again and it was successful. I am concerned that we will have difficulty conceiving again and will have to go through the Invitro Fertilization again. I am not so sure I want to and I am not so sure my husband wants to either. If we were able to get pregnant naturally then I think this decision would be a little easier to make. But this is not the case so I am back to my original question, is it time to have another baby.

All of my friends that were pregnant the same time I was the first time are all having baby number two. Some have already him/her and some are finishing up their 9th month as I type this. I feel as if I am supposed to be having another baby because of this. I am 35 years old, soon to be 36 in a couple of months and am worried about my age. When you are dealing with the infertility world, turning 35 changes everything. You have to take different medications, your chances go down, things like that. So not only am I 35 now, I will be 36 once we even start the process. I am in fear that the clock is ticking and things my chances are going down by the minute. Another age factor is my husband. He just turned 40 last month. I know his age doesn't matter in the conceiving part of the process, but I worry that he will be an older dad. I don't know if he necessarily would want to be that. When I talk to him about this he says it doesn't matter, whatever i want. He just wants me to be happy. So the question is back on me once again.

I watch my sister who had three girls all two years apart and I am in awe. How does she do it? I don't think I would have the patience. She tells me you don't think about it, you just do it. Maybe that's my problem, I think too much. I am a planner. I am constantly organizing and scheduling. So to me I have to think this decision through thoroughly. I know that I have enough love to go around, that's not the problem. My biggest concern is that my husband owns his own business and he is barely home. He only takes one day off a week and that is Sunday. He leaves very early in the morning and doesn't come him until late at night. He does get home in time for my son's bedtime routine which he takes care of, thankfully. By then I am spent. I also work full time so not only do I work from 7:30 to 3:00 (I am a teacher), I work from the time I get my son (3:30) to the time he goes to bed (8:00). It is an extremely long day for me. This is where I don't know how I am supposed to fit a second baby in. My mom lives in Florida so there isn't too much help there. Although she did fly out when he had a bad cold and I couldn't take off from work. My in-laws are wonderful. They have helped me out so much in the past but I can't keep asking them for help.

Back to my question. Is it time? After writing this article and getting my thoughts out, I think I have figured out my answer. I will keep that to myself and will write a new article with my decision. I will let you know how things turned out!