Time to Turn Over a New Leaf

Looking out my office window, I noticed a slight hint of red in a beech tree and I smiled at the small glimpse of fall beauty that I'll soon have in my new yard with it's 25 trees. Fall is a season that nurtures me and soothes my soul before winter's cold. The colors, the scents, the feel of fall wake me up from hot sleepy slumbers and invigorates my movements. I feel energized and optimistic, reflective of the 8 months of the year that have passed so swiftly.

The Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur is set in September, a time right before the harvest when Jews are to spend a day in public and private atonement in a sacred withdrawal from the world so that they might become right with God and others, renewing a sense of passion and purpose in their lives.

So it is for me in September also. As children, September marked the time that we returned to school, to the work of education. It was an exciting time for those of us, including me, who loved school and books. It was time for learning to begin again after our summer idyll. We donned our new school clothes, packed our new school bag with its new school supplies and off we marched, ready to be changed into perfect little adults. Remember your dedication to the task, sure that this year we would get all A's on every assignment.

The change in the season, the colors shifting and plants turning vivid shades of red and gold, signal that perhaps we need to turn over a new "leaf" ourselves. It's time we stop our wasteful idle summer ways and embrace industry and purpose for the remainder of the year.

We prepare for winter's onslaught by winterizing our homes and harvesting our fields and gardens. Perhaps we make jam, pick apples, lay in extra food and firewood for long cold winter days. But in all that industry, I think perhaps the real change for fall is that we realize how swiftly time is passing. The changing of the seasons have long been the stuff of metaphors and poetry.

I find myself in the autumn of my life this year, perhaps about 2/3 to ¾ of the way to the end. The change is curious, scary and hopeful. I see the inevitable, but it no longer frightens me. Instead I find myself with new energy, new vision and new resolutions. But these autumn resolutions, unlike the ones in January, aren't about doing better, working harder, being stronger.

Instead I have a desire to turn over a new leaf in this time of my life, to be about my wants and needs. I'm leaving child rearing behind, finally! And in it's absence I am rekindling me. For all of us, perhaps autumn should be about our wants in this life. What is it that haunts us, draws us and beckons us to embrace?

What do we need to make us love the life we're leading? Do we need more romance or time alone? Do we want adventures and quiet time? Perhaps it's as simple as taking more walks in the park or finding time to read the latest novel. If like me, you find yourself staring down the tunnel toward the end, perhaps it's time to shirk some of the duties of life and embrace the joys of living.

I want to travel to new places. I want to sit on the beach of a foreign shore. I want to right a wrong. I want to love. I want to sit on a mountain top. I want to swim in the ocean. I want to paint my world with words. What are your wants for your September resolutions? You don't have to tell anyone, just start choosing your wants over other's needs..some of the time. :)

Autumn to winter, winter to spring,

Spring into summer, summer into fall...

So rolls the changing year, and so we change;

Motion so swift, we know not that we move.

Dinah Mulock Craik