Tips for Adjusting to Culture Shock

Living in a foreign country can be difficult. About two years ago I moved to Ecuador from the United States. I enjoy living here but it has not always been easy. Here are some tips for adjusting to life in a new country:

1. Be yourself. This one is definitely the most important. Being a foreigner sometimes means that people are observing, evaluating and judging me. Invariably I am criticized for something, or I realize that someone does not approve of, or makes fun of, me or how I do things. That's OK, there is not much I can do to change their pre-conceived ideas about me (at least in the short term). But it doesn't mean that I should change who or what I am just to please them. Of course, I try my best to fit into the culture as much as possible - I put a lot of effort into improving my Spanish and I try to follow some of the more common cultural practices (such as shaking everyone's hand in the room, inviting and accepting invitations at the drop of a hat, always taking the time to chat with friends on the street, etc.). But it is just as important for me to recognize the fact that I am from a different country, and a different culture, and that no matter what, I are going to be different (and that's OK).

2. Find things you love. Every place in the world has its positives and negatives, and everyone has their unique set of likes and dislikes. When I think back on my life in the States I can remember a lot of things I enjoyed doing, but there were also a lot of things that I really disliked (i.e. the hour commute to work every morning through gridlock traffic). It has been very helpful for me to find things that I really, really enjoy about life in Ecuador and to be involved in them as often as possible. Sometimes it can be difficult, but it is essential. Otherwise I would find myself living a painful, frustrating life, day in and day out. Adjusting to a new culture is hard work, and it is important to take breaks.

Also I try to avoid letting someone else decide what is right for me. When I was a Peace Corps volunteer we were discouraged from living with other English-speakers because it was thought that we would not learn Spanish and we would be unable to integrate into Ecuadorian culture. I ended up rooming with other English-speaking foreigners for almost the entire time, but I also made lots of Ecuadorian friends (including my the guy I eventually married) and my Spanish got pretty good. This situation might not have worked for other people, but it worked well for me.

3. Avoid unnecessary criticism. It is inevitable that I will find myself frustrated and fed up sometimes with the way things work in Ecuador. It is helpful to vent, but I try to avoid the tendency to start seeing everything in a negative light (a common 'side-effect' of culture shock). Just because one person cut in front of me in line doesn't mean that everyone in the country is rude. Just because someone was late for (or didn't show up for) an appointment doesn't mean that all Ecuadorians are lazy or untrustworthy. It's important to put things in perspective and it's best to take things with a big dose of humor.

Also, it is important to avoid developing a superiority complex. It is very common to notice things here are not as efficient, clean or fast as in the States or other "developed" countries. There are many reasons for this (some obvious, others not so obvious) and I don't assume to know or understand all of them. What I'm sure of is that it has nothing to do with some kind of inherent "superiority" of one culture, or group of people, over another.

4. Create a comfortable daily routine. When my daughter was born I heard a lot of advice about the importance of following a consistent bedtime routine to make it easier for the baby to fall asleep. It seemed to work for her and I also noticed that I also enjoyed my own little routines that I did throughout the day. After moving to Ecuador I made a point of finding times where I could set up a daily routine (i.e. making breakfast in the morning, surfing the internet in the afternoon, etc.). These routines provide a little order and predictability in an otherwise hectic life and help reduce the effects of culture shock.

5. Make friends with other expats. Although I enjoy hanging out with Ecuadorians and I do so often I also make an effort to spend time with other foreigners living here in Ecuador. Many of them are also experiencing some level of culture shock and it can be helpful to share experiences and support each other. Plus I've met some very interesting people who are living in, or traveling through, Ecuador.