Tips for Dealing with Disappointed Kids on Christmas Morning

With all the expectation looming in the air over opening gifts on Christmas morning, you're hoping your children are satisfied with what they find under the tree. But what if all you see, instead, are disappointed faces? What should you do? Better yet, what can you do to prepare both your children as well as yourself if you know they may be less than thrilled over what Santa left for them. Here are a few suggestions to help you and your children cope with not finding the perfect gifts under the tree Christmas morning...

Prepare Your Children before Christmas

If you realize that what's on your children's Christmas list is unreasonable or not within your budget, sit down and talk to them. For example, say something such as, "I understand how much you want a puppy for Christmas. However, I'm afraid Santa can't come through with that type of gift. A puppy is a big responsibility and we're just aren't able to add a pet to the family right now. Is there something else that you'd like for Christmas that's almost as special as a puppy?

Explain About Safety Problems of Dangerous Toys

If your eleven-year-old son asks for a B-B gun and you have doubts about the safety of the toy, be honest with him.. Explain about the safety hazards of certain toys and how he needs to be mature enough to handle the responsibility of using them. If your child still whines about not getting a BB gun, then encourage him that if he proves himself within the next year being responsible, then maybe you'll reconsider. Stress how he needs to earn the privilege rather than just because he's growing older and all his friends have BB guns.

Show Concern Over Your Child's Disappointment

Don't shout, "Tough, that's life---Get over it!" When you first sense your children are upset that they didn't get those special gifts, look directly into their eyes and express how you're sorry they're disappointed. Then, tell them why you thought it wasn't a good idea that they get what they wanted. If they persist with bad behavior, then it's time to give them a choice---they either choose to have a good attitude and behave properly or they suffer consequences----even on Christmas morning.

Use Their Disappointment as a Teaching Moment

If you suspect that Grandma is going to give your children new underwear, instead of toys, prepare them. Then stress how important it is to be grateful even if they didn't get what they really wanted. And, don't forget to insist they write thank you notes for all their gifts.

Focus on Other Holiday Highlights

After you've taken the time to show your children that you care about their disappointment, shift the focus to other positive highlights of the day. In other words, focus on holiday fun such as playing with their cousins and grandparents, enjoying Christmas dinner, sledding in the snow, etc.

Focus on the Joy of Helping Others

Make a conscious effort to show your children that Christmas is not all about gifts and how it brings even greater joy to give than to receive. Explain to them how happy it makes not only their elderly relatives, but them as well, when they take time to serve Christmas treats to Grandpa and Grandma and sing carols to shut-ins.

Be Realistic

Be reasonable about your expectations of Christmas Day. If you tell yourself, as well as your children, not to expect everything to be perfect, you and your children won't be as let down if the day doesn't go as smoothly as you'd planned. Realize how silly it is to put so much expectation into one day of the year. Just because it's Christmas doesn't mean your mother-in-law won't criticize your parenting or your Christmas dinner will be flawless. If situations occur that are predictable, just laugh and say, "Well, what did I expect?"

Most of all focus on the spiritual side of Christmas. It's so easy to get bogged down in all the materialism, parents miss the real meaning of Christmas. Use this holy season to share with your children the gift of God's son--- the greatest gift of all.