Tips on Easing the Potty Training Nightmare

I think it's a safe assumption to say every parent dreads potty training. In fact, potty training can be horribly stressful on both child and parent. It's an indefinite process even before potty training officially begins. Being a recent victim of what I felt was a nightmare of potty training, I came up with some ideas to de-stress the parent and make it more of a goal TO do for children. These are just tried and true from yours truly and worth a shot.

Let me say firstly that you, as a parent will want to rip your hair out and bash your head into a wall a few dozen times if you aren't one of the lucky parents who gets a child that is like a dream-come-true in potty training. Yes, these kids exist. One to two weeks tops and bam, potty training both day and night complete. It's all right to be completely envious of these kids and parents, because they are extremely blessed to have such an easy time. Anger and yelling may seem like a way to get the message across (Yes, I know people who get so flustered about potty training they can't help but scream) but in actuality, if you yell at the kid to go potty what're you showing? That it's a scary process. Yeah, I wouldn't dare go into a bathroom if someone yelled at me to repeatedly. Remember that it's a new experience for you AND the child (or if you're really blessed - children) involved and requires a vast amount of patience. I don't mean over an extended period, I mean every single time you take the little darling into the potty and get stuck sitting on a cold floor for half an hour only to discover the child isn't going to go- until RIGHT after the pullup is back on their little bottom.

Have a sense of humor. There WILL be accidents and you don't want to have your blood pressure go up just because of a little wee wee on the floor or another pullup to be changed. Rome wasn't built in a day, this applies in so many areas of life. Just smile and realize that it's one less pullup you'll ever have to change. Remember in Look Who's Talking Too when Mikey is being confronted about the potty? His parents start dancing and singing like clowns. Make it a fun experience and I'm guaranteeing that the potty training will not be as bad as others have made it out to be. Make up silly songs, make up a 'pee pee' dance that signals the parent that it's time to go. These do work. In fact, my daughter came up with a signal to let me know, she bends over and makes an X with her arms over her legs and then runs for the potty. It may seem silly and childish, but hey, they're children and it works.

Sitting on a cold bathroom floor or uncomfortable rug for a while can be quite boring. You're sitting there thinking, "hurry up I have things to do - please please PLEASE for the love of whatever, go!" It doesn't hurt to make it a reading time. Bring a book in, adults do it after all. Tell a story, sing a song or just plain talk. It's not disgusting or creepy, it's letting a kid feel relaxed. That feeling of security and relaxation are very important to making it a success. If you let the child know that he or she can be at ease in there then they probably won't be tense and will go.

Don't be afraid to bring your child in with you when you go to the bathroom. This lets the child know that even mommy (or daddy) has to go potty. This was a big baiter to my daughter. She wanted to wear big kids underwear and not have to be bothered with laying down, being wiped, powdered and re-pulluped before playing. Plus, she thought underwear was far prettier than icky, cold bunchy pullups. Explain what you're doing and why, as well as state that it's healthy and not a bad thing to go in a potty. Often times if a child knows they aren't alone in this potty thing then they catch on and will eventually go.

Rewards. My daughter was a buff for wanting to go to McDonald's once a month. So we made an agreement. I would take her to McDonald's IF she went to the potty all week long and didn't have many accidents. I kept reminding her, "You can do it!" and giving her this positive reinforcement that she must've needed. By the first week of potty training she'd only had one small accident and that was on the way TO a potty. She was working for a goal and completed it. Some think of these rewards as merely 'bribing' a child do to what you want, however, it isn't. Bribing is like, "I'll give you ten dollars to sweep the kitchen floor." However, she knew that it was a treat anyways to go to her favorite restaurant and she was bent on getting there. She was also told if she didn't let me or anybody else know she had to use the potty that she would not go. This almost upset her. But, it made her work doubly hard. By week two she had even stopped most nighttime accidents. Rewards never hurt.

This night time trick I used on my daughter. I don't know if anyone else has tried it, but it was a miracle for me. She has to have a drink of water before bed like most kids. And this had me worried initially about 'she's going to go in the night and be wet in the morning'. So I decided to try something. Every night I put her to bed and said, "Don't go in your sleep, if you have to go, get up and wake me." So we tried this for the first week and it was only mildly a success. She still tended to sleep through the urges. But in the morning she headed straight for the potty. So she had grasped onto daytime potty by the first week.

By week two she was still being told to wake up and run, not to wet her pullup. I don't know fully if what I said triggered it, but it's worth a try at any rate. I kept saying this line before bed and sure enough, she would start to wake up and have to go at 2..3 .. various times of the night. She would go right back to sleep after another small drink and remain dry until potty time in the morning. When she did make it through the night I would give her hugs and call her a big girl. Praise her. If she did happen to have an accident I didn't sweat it. You can't afford to.

Sometimes I wouldn't be in with her when she went, so she actually came up with a way to let me know she was done. She would run into the bathroom alone, get up on the potty and upon completing make her own fanfare song. "Da da da daaa! I'm done!" She became horribly proud of this fanfare that I would cringe on occasion hearing it. It was loud and quite often at times. I would then go in and make sure she wiped properly and completely (I emphasize on teaching the kids proper wiping, I know people who don't and their seven year olds have infections from lack of hygiene) and then flush. We set up a complete routine of pull up the underwear, pull up the pants, close the lid, flush and wash your hands. Routine is excellent for anyone and little kids pick up on it so easily it's amazing.

Remember that potty training IS a new experience for every child and even if you have six children already trained, it's your first time with this one. Treat it as something special and new, because you can't guarantee a dream child every time. If the child doesn't grasp on right away or isn't ready, don't force them to go. They will adapt to the idea when they deem themselves ready. Remember: kids can be more stubborn than you. Good luck and think of the day when you no longer need pullups to carry yourself through!