Tips for Keeping a Strong Relationship with Your Older Kids After They Move Out

Sunflower
Many of us hope our kids never grow up and some of us can't wait until their all grown up and out of the house, whatever the case may be we should always try to keep a good relationship with them, so that they'll always feel comfortable about coming to visit their parents or calling when they need to talk about something or just say hello. Here are some tips on keeping a strong relationship with your older kids after they move out.

1.) Always make them feel you love and care for them and not checking up on them when ever you call them or pay them a visit.

2.) Never call your kids and say things like, "where have you been I've been calling you all day, what have you been doing?" That will give them the impression you're checking up on them like you did when they were a kid still living at home.

3.) When you do give your son or daughter a call, just let them know you just called to say hello, and that you were thinking about them. You have to let them call you themselves and tell you whats going on in their lives first, as hard as that may be, and if you get nothing out of them, try talking about something else like something that's going on with you, that will make them feel you care and then they'll feel more comfortable about telling you whats going on in their lives. Or you can start by telling them whats going on in your life and about things that's happening around your house since they left, this is just s to get them to talk to you about things that may or may not be going on in their lives.

4.) You have to talk to your grown up kids just like you're talking to another grown up unrelated to you, because your kid is a grown up to now, they're considered as an adult. I know it's hard to talk to your grown up kid or kids like an adult since you're the one who raise them but, it's important to treat them like an adult when their all grown up, because they'll respect you more if you're not still treating them like a child. Your kids still love you and may have act terrible as a child or teenager, and it may seem like they didn't care at that time, they didn't but, they was just acting their age and didn't know how to act in any other way except inappropriate in whatever situation that occurred.

5.) When your kids grows up you have to change the way you talk to them and let them make their own decisions good or bad but, try to always be there for them in case they need a helping hand, this is how they learn and grow up, give them advice but, do it indirectly when you're trying to get information from them so that they don't think you're still trying to run their lives. Also whenever you call them try not to say things like "How come I never get a call from you anymore?" because if you treat your son or daughter like their not an adult they won't be calling you at all, you don't want to push them away from you by not giving them their space to grow and think for themselves.

6.) When they asked for your advise asked them what they think first before you tell them what you think about the problem, because you don't want them to blame you if it didn't work out that way. It's just that when you want to know something about them, you don't want it to be so obvious. Your kids will talk to you if you treat them like an adult, they'll pretty much tell you everything that's going on in their lives but, they have to feel comfortable first talking to you like a grown up. Remember, their only use to the way you treated them as a kid when they were growing up.

Published by Sunflower

I enjoy painting, art, and writing stories. I also enjoy making things like, sculptures, and jewelry.  View profile

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  • Angela Atkinson9/4/2008

    Very wise words. More parents should follow them...and I hope to be able to do do when my little birds leave the nest one day!

  • Gloria Doby9/8/2007

    Thanks lily,I hope it helps more parents too

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