Tips on Raising 5 Kids

I have five birth children from the ages of one month to 13 years. I love my kids more than anything but there are challenges that come with such a full house. One thing that I have noticed over the years is that few parenting articles and books give solid advice to large families. Many things I have had to learn on my own, often the hard way. Here are some tips on raising five kids.

Get Organized

You simply cannot manage a large family unless you get organized. I work at home and my children are homeschooled so we are together all day long. This is a bonus- and one of the main reasons we do this- but it also means organization is essential to meeting goals and getting things done on a regular basis.

You can find some free family organizational tools and charts online that let you get organized with ease. I've found that it is very important to put it in writing so that you and other members of the family can keep up with it all.

Create a Meal Schedule

Planning meals with that many people can be a real hassle. You won't believe how much stress came off of my husband and me when you found a way to create a meal schedule. We use e-mealz.com and plan meals for the whole month. Once a week we go to the grocery store and get the ingredients we will need, along with drinks and snacks for the week.

Each night at dinner time, one of us prepares the meal. No arguing or debating about who likes what, no wasted food that didn't get cooked or used, and no last minute fast food meals because whatever we had planned fell through. We save money and we eat healthier and those are things that are great for the whole family.

Delegate the Chores

I believe that no child is too young to do chores. This doesn't mean we slave them like worker-bees but rather that every member of the family has their own responsibilities to help out the family. We naturally expect the kids to clean up after themselves and to keep their personal rooms and spaces in order but we also delegate the household chores.

Even the little ones are able to help out with certain chores and we rotate who does what so one person doesn't get burnt out. We use a chore chart to help determine who will have certain chores for the week, including mom and dad.

One thing that you have to be careful of in a large family is that you don't put too much responsibility on the older children. Too often in large families, the parents get used to the older children being there but the younger children not being old enough to help out. These patterns stick as the kids grow older and the oldest ones tend to be overworked. This isn't fair nor is it practical. They will get burnout or they will rebel.

Remember that children as young as two can do certain chores or help an adult or older child with chores so don't be afraid to put the little ones to work as well!

Make Time for Everyone

One thing a big family should have a lot more of is love! It's important to make time for everyone- and also for mom and dad to get some alone time together regularly. The problem is that with such a large family, you may find you have to schedule time in just to be sure you don't miss anyone.

We have one parent's night out date a month (at minimum) and I also do mother-daughter dates with my oldest daughter. We go to the movies, lunch, nail salon or spa, window shopping or whatever activity she chooses. I make plans with the little ones to do something just with mom and plan time to hang out with my oldest son as well. Every member of the family needs to be willing to work towards a schedule that includes everyone.

The older children spend some time playing with the younger kids and also get mom and dad time alone as well. This is important to the emotional health of the children and the entire family. If your kids are involved in activities, you may find that as parents you have to split and shuffle to get everyone where they need to be on time. Make sure you avoid situations that can cause hurt feelings- such as one parent is the only one to watch a particular child's activity. Mix it up and spread the love and attention evenly.

Create a Financial Budget

Large families are expensive but when you're smart about it, you can live comfortably on your budget. Be sure to create a comfortable budget together with your partner and then stick with this budget so you don't have to worry about finances with your large family. Don't forget to budget in recreation, entertainment and kids' activities and birthdays.