Tips for Raising a Tween

Raising a tween can be difficult. So called because it is the stage between early childhood and adolescence, a tween includes children 10 to 12 years old. Since you can expect a child in this stage to display early adolescent characteristics, such as peer influence, risk taking, and challenging rules, it is important that you help your tween manage their newfound behaviors. Here are some tips for raising tweens.

Foster Independence: Like many stages of growing up, your tween will push toward the next level of independence. Provide them with opportunities to practice age-appropriate decision making, such as deciding wardrobe or activities. Allow them more time to spend with peers away from home, whether it be at a school function or at a friend's house. This helps equip your tween with valuable social skills and experience in taking care of themselves. You know your child best, so keep in mind his or her maturity level during this process. Remember also that it is still your job as a parent to make sure your child is always in a safe environment.

Foster Responsibility: Teach your tween that with independence comes responsibility. Provide your child with opportunities to be responsible for themselves and their belongings. Assign age-appropriate chores for your them to complete on a daily basis, such as taking out the trash or taking care of pets. Help your tween establish priorities, such as school work before computer time.

Personal Space: Your tween's need for privacy is increasing, so make sure he or she has a place to get away from family and siblings. If your tween shares a room with a sibling, establish a time for your tween to have the bedroom to themselves. You may notice that your tween has a disinterest in family events. It is important not to allow your tween to become isolated, so be sure to involve your them in family-oriented activities, such as dinners or outings.

Communicate: You may see changes in the way your tween communicates with you. They may seem withdrawn, or be more excited to talk to friends than their parents. This is normal, so don't take it personally. However, encourage communication with your tween (even if it seems that you are asking questions and your tween is giving you one-word answers). Let your tween know that you are always available.

Manage Emotions: It may seem that your tween is often moody, challenging rules and getting upset when things don't go their way. Teach your tween to deal with their anger and other emotions in positive way. Encourage communication, and make it known that yelling and violence are not acceptable ways to deal with anger. Give your child an outlet, whether it be journaling, music, or a sports activity.

These are just a few ways to help your child (and yourself) get through the tween stage. Dealing with issues as they arise, while helping your tween develop valuable social and coping skills, will help assure that they are better equipped for the next stage of development: the teenage years.