To the Bludgeoning Rhino Telemarketer: Are You Aware that We Just Sat Down to Dinner?

I worked one day at a call center for 6 hours. I have one day's worth of insight on the telecommunication industry that would improve what's left of it to make it more human-friendly.

First off, shared keyboards in a building with 100 computer stations is a fool-hardy thing to do. To the industry: Did you expect me to come to work sick and pass it to everyone in the building on every shift? That might work to shut down the industry. Did you expect me to lose my job because if I miss three days I am canned? Did you expect me to default on an obligation, thereby choosing between whether or not I can pay rent, keep up the reliable car you expect me to have to get to work, or food? I mean, like, you do pay minimum wage for the peon starter job.

Second off, if anyone is sick in the training even with a cold, they don't belong there so kick their hind end out of the training. Because of someone's beginnings of the flu in the two hour training, I caught the flu, and was not able to come in for the second day. It was an entry level facility. Their notes on hand: it was not the job for her. I didn't want to be rude by moving across the room from the sick person. Next time, if there ever was a next time, I would be that rude. I had the flu for a week from them coming to work sick. That would be one thing, but to be told that you don't have your own dedicated computer (there were shifts, as well so you could irritate people 16 hours around the clock and specifically call to make certain that you caught them coming, going, or at meal time).

Third, if the training actually had a person witness live calls before going live to real customers they would get much further with customer relations. I couldn't believe this company - about three hours of "training" using videos and manuals and then, whammo, on the phones. What? Like I am supposed to deal with the bitchy person who has been called at dinnertime with three hours of training when we are expressly told "Don't argue with them? Keep reading the script. Don't butt in. (Or we will can your hind end if you are negative to them.) I mean, this person who was called at home at 5 pm actually had the audacity to butt in: "Are you aware that we just sat down to dinner?" I mean, what was I supposed to say when I am being taped: "Um, this company whose rules I despise make me read this inhuman, royally sucking script and won't let me ask if there is a better time to reach you?" For the record, we were doing surveys, governmental surveys no less. As for the job itself, it was a mindless, repetitive job where the keystrokes were concerned. Tap this key, a dialog comes up, you have so many seconds before a customer will be live on the line. You could actually get a repetitive injury from that type of job. And all for minimum wage.

We were NOT allowed to hang up on the customer and we were specifically instructed not to flip them off with the F word. They told us what happened to the person who did. Because if we did, we would be taped, our supervisor would find out, and it would be put up on the board in the entry, and our hind ends would be canned and our stories would live in infamy if we dared to cross the customer who was mad at being called at the wrong time, or was just mad at telemarketing in general, an industry that plays off of whatever it can get, the bottom feeders. The customers that did chew me out created an intense ball of stress in my stomach. By that day, I could bitched out anyone out.

The moral of the story: Pollyanna positive attitude will never make it in customer service and maybe there is a reason why the run of the mill customer service representative will definitely argue with you for 20 minutes and not be helpful. Is it because they are in the elite customer service ranks, the ranks you can't get into unless you have 1 to 2 hours of the company that won't let you interrupt a script to apologize to a customer?

If you want to put customer service that sucks out of business, go to www.donotcall.gov and put yourself on the do not call list. They will be so desperate to worm their way into marketing again they might actually pay attention to consumer opinion about the way that they treat people that they survey or want to sell to.