Top 10 Funny Facts from Our Dumb World

Our Dumb World: The Onion's Atlas of Planet Earth is a parody written by The Onion. The book features untrue facts and statistics which play up stereotypes and other notable events that have taken place around the world in a humorous and at times offensive fashion. The following ten tidbits are among the funniest dumb facts about the United States of America.

No. 10 funny US time-line fact: "1950 - Drunken Sen. Joseph McCarthy accuses an empty barstool of being a communist."

No. 9 dumb history fact: "Give me liberty or give me a large cash settlement, a brand new Mercedes, a 52 inch TV, a personal chef, a whole new wardrobe, extra butter, plastic surgery, and that house over there."

No. 8 funny US vital statistic: "Traditional American cuisine: #5 combo."

No. 7 dumb time-line fact: "2001 - Americans vow to be furious about the Enron scandal as soon as they understand what it is."

No. 6 dumb time-line fact: "2007 - Millions of Americans drive to Washington DC to protest global warming."

No. 5 funny US time-line fact: "1492 - Christopher Columbus kindly informs the Native Americans that they're standing on his country."

No. 4 funny US time-line fact: "1865 - Robert E Lee agrees to surrender and end the Civil War on the condition that 193 high schools in the South be named after him."

No. 3 dumb time-line fact: "1966 - Everyone in the US spends the year hiding underneath their desks."

No. 2 funny fact: "The US was founded in 1776 on the principles of life, liberty, and the reckless pursuit of happiness at any cost - even life and liberty."

No. 1 funny fact: "America is a place where even the poorest immigrant can, through hard work and dedication, achieve the American Dream for his employee."

Source:

The Onion, (Editor: Scott Dikkers). Our Dumb World: The Onion's Atlas of Planet Earth. Little Brown and Company, 73 Edition, 2007.