Top 10 Signs that You Are an AC Addict

10. When you go to a friend's house, you make an excuse to use their computer, like, "Hey, you ever wonder where the phrase 'cut the mustard' came from? Mind if I look it up for you online?" You pretend the search for the answer takes a long time as you sneakily log into your account so you can rate all your articles with 5's.

9. You know the exact amount of your performance bonus, to the penny, at any given time. (Mine's currently standing at $11.01)

8. You recruit all your friends and family members, even your Great Aunt Mildred, who can barely type, to start writing articles so that more people will be reading what you write (and hopefully rating it with 5's).

7. When conversing with friends you enjoy the feeling of importance and dignity that you get when someone brings up something that relates to one of your articles, and you chime in by saying, "Well, it's funny you should mention llamas, because just the other day I published this article on llama herding, and it's gotten 47 page views."

6. You've given yourself the authority to make up unfounded statistics to put into the "interesting fact" section of your articles, like, "Did you know that 72 percent of cats are republicans?"

5. You have found a nemesis on AC whose articles take a stance that is the exact opposite of yours on all the big controversial topics. You still like to read their articles, just so you can leave argumentative comments.

4. You have attended a town hall meeting.

3. No matter where you are or what you are doing, you secretly think, "I could write an article about this!"

2. You do all your birthday and christmas shopping from your paypal account.

1. You just wrote an article about how to tell if you are addicted to AC.