Top 10 Things I've Learned from Owning My Cats

Owning two cats has been quite the experience. There are tons of cat owners out in the world. I don't know if I have odd-ball cats, or everyone's are like this! But, I've learned a lot.

1. No matter how much work you need to get done on the computer, your cat will stand in front of the monitor. Once you remove her, she will come back and continue to do so until you have passed your deadline.

2. You smell something funny, and realize that there has been half of a dead mouse lying under your bed for an unspecified amount of time.

3. You smell more funny things, only to not be able to trace the source until you move your upright piano to find your cat was not pleased with her cat box. By this time, you have hired several large men to move the piano for you, and they get to witness your surprise with you.

4. When you want to cuddle with your cat, you will be met with a hiss and will be missing half of your eyebrow by the time your cat is done telling you it's not time to cuddle.

5. When you don't want to cuddle with your cat because you are dressed and ready to go to work, your cat will conveniently crawl into your lap, only to shed all of her hair suddenly onto your new dress suit.

6. Your cat will scratch anything within 25 feet of her cat box into her cat box. This will include your credit card bills and your presentation that's due for work the next day.

7. Your cat does not enjoy eating cat food from her bowl. Instead, she will find it more fun to eat it directly from the bag, which you haven't opened yet. To accomplish this, she will get into your storage area and rip the bag apart herself.

8. Your cat will pretend to love you for a few minutes every now and then. In her quest to show you her love, she will conveniently deposit dead mouse bodies on everyone's bed. She does not limit herself to just one or two people, she wants to share the love with everyone.

9. Make sure your laundry is folded and put away immediately upon completion of the dryer cycle. If not, your cat will make a bed on your clean clothes, and will lose all of her fur on top of it. This will ensure you wash your clothes again, dry them again and she can be secured of a new, warm pile of clothes again.

10. Even though my cats are pretty anti-social, they still know the right times when I could use an extra friend or two.

As much as my cats like to annoy me, they are worth their weight in gold, or cat food. I think a cat's way of showing love is to see how mad they can make you first, that's the only way I can figure it. I think it's a secret cat game. If I had to do it again, I wouldn't change a thing.