Top 10 Ways to Tell You Have a Ghetto Nurse

I decided to bring back my top 10 articles that used to be so popular. No names will be mentioned to protect the guilty or innocent. if you feel like any of the top 10 relate to you, they probably do. The top 10 are listed in no particular order.

She arrives on a bus and has no working vehicle.

She wears thrift shop clothes instead of nurses scrubs.

She does not know the meaning of contraception and has 5+ children, each with a different father. (Horizontal polka in overdrive.)

She can speak Spanish with a perfect Latino accent. (No hablo español!)

She does not bring food with her and gives hints that she is hungry. (Welcome to Casa de Gugie!)

She arrives late and leaves early.

She knows every place to get free or discounted merchandise (government agencies, pawnshops, etc.).

She shows up on your doorstep late at night with a stethoscope, after she was fired. (Can you say stalker?)

She brags excessively about her career and family, even though they are all living in an attic apartment and on unemployment benefits. (Did you all know that I am a billionaire?)

She is the subject of several articles about the poor spread out over several years. (News travels fast!)

Bonus #1: Her favorite foods include fried chicken, cornbread, grits, plantains and burritos. (Not that I don't like soul food.)

Bonus #2: She often sings soul music throughout her visit. (Sweet low, Sweet chariot!)

Bonus #3: She is excessively religious, often Feeling the power of God flowing through her body and her father was a preacher. (Can I get a hallelujah?!!)