Top 10 New Year's Resolutions for Rod Blagojevich

10. When saying you don't care if anyone is tapping your phone, you should make sure that nobody is, in fact, tapping your phone.

9. Continue living in complete denial.

8. Try not to alienate so many people.

7. Look for a new hairstyle.

6. Maybe try to clean up that potty mouth.

5. Keep the wife out of the room when attempting to strong-arm financial contributions.

4. Don't forget that newspapers are likely to print unflattering editorials if you demand they fire the people writing the unflattering editorials.

3. Update the resume. Maybe the Dallas Cowboys are looking for someone to work in middle management.

2. Remember that people go to Hell for blackmailing children's hospitals.

1. Try not to undermine the US Government if at all possible.