Top Reasons People Divorce

Is Divorce is the Back of Your Mind as You Are Saying "I Do"

Linda M.  McCloud
"Do you take this man or this woman to be your husband or your wife till death due you part? That is the question you are asked during your marriage vows. But in the back of your mind were you thinking, sure I take this person. But if it doesn't work I'll file for a divorce and get on with my life?

If that thought was in the back of your mind, you are not alone. It must be in the back of some couple's minds because 50 to 60% of today's newlyweds will divorce. Why?

The number one reason is money. They say money makes the world go around. But they also say it is the root of all evil.

The other top reasons for divorce:

Infidelity.

Poor communication

Change in priorities. This can be caused by having kids or due to ones job, big things.

Lack of commitment to the marriage.

Sexual problems.

Other reasons that come up frequently, but not as frequently are:

Addictions

Failed expectations of your spouse (believing one is a super hero or that he/she can fix or be everything to or for you)

Physical, emotional or sexual abuse.


You know the reasons. Now what can you do to make sure that your marriage doesn't end in divorce court?

First of all, continue to work at it. Don't take your marriage or your spouse for granted. It is so easy to do. You love this person. You know this person loves you. You assume he/she will always be there. With time, you neglect the little things that were special.

You forget to take time for him/her. You quit doing the little things he/she loved. You don't make the brownies as often, you don't buy the flowers. You don't have sex as often or even worse yet it is always a scheduled event.

You don't talk out your differences. He/she does something that annoys you. You push it inside you. You do this a lot of the time. It stays inside of you building, building until you want to scream. Find the time to talk even about the little stuff.

Money. Don't let it put a wedge between you. Work at your budget together. One may be better at doing the math than the other one is. But still make sure you both have input.

What do you do about infidelity? That is a tough question to answer. Some people can forgive a spouse for being unfaithful. Was it an one night stand or an ongoing affair? Why did it happen? Those are questions you need to ask, after your anger has simmered some. Can you really forgive your spouse? Will you be able to trust him/her again? These are questions only you can answer?

Does therapy help? For some couples, therapy is great and will help solve some of the issues that are hurting your marriage. Both parties need to believe in therapy and be willing to be honest in it. If you just go through the motions and say what you think your partner and the therapist want you to say, you aren't helping your marriage any.

Is there a key to keep your marriage safe? No. Love is not even the key. There isn't one key. There are several sets of keys. They work together in harmony. Notice the phrase is work together because that is what marriage is two people working together for a lasting future.

Published by Linda M. McCloud

Freelance writer living in Ohio, who is striving to learn more each day, especially about topics that relates to health, wellness, diet, weight loss & exercise. Enjoys taking what I learn and sharing it with...  View profile

  • What is the major cause of divorce? Money issues.
  • What is the second cause of divorce? Infidelity.
  • Love is not the key for a successful marriage. There is no keys. There are many keys.
Fifty to sixty percent of all people getting married today will find themselves in divorce court soon.

132 Comments

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  • mvgepte4/29/2011

    i never been married but as a research and observation most couple getting divorce is because , no respecte each other, no love and financial problem lastly they found someone else.. so if you think that a good idea to file a divorce, do it, what ever it takes... to make you guys free.. :-)

  • xxx2/24/2011

    well when the wife is working fulltime paying all the bills to have no money left while the husband works part time and pays for nothing its hard to take and going on for 20 years....he gets enraged if you ask him to get fulltime job and there are 4 kids in the home....its not fair

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  • Janet (guest)1/26/2011

    to: that chick my advice to you is to
    RUN LIKE HELL FROM THIS GUY BABY, YOU ARE IN FOR A BIG FALL, USE ARE NOT USING YOUR HEAD!!!!! man, I can't believe how dumb you are

  • guest1/26/2011

    Texas girl... go back to school and learn how to speak English. Your comment was horribly written. Did you sleep through english class? I am just trying to let you know because you wrote terribly.

  • guest1/26/2011

    My exhusband and I had a fairy tale start and a nightmarish end. He ruined my credit while his is still great changing my name was a hassle not for him he didn have to. He got hooked on Oxycontin and alcohol, toxic commbination!, It has been 4 years and I still do not want a relationship whatsoever. I am over him but am having a hard time trusting another man nor do I want to, my heart just can't take it again. Nor do I have the desire for sex. What a loser he is!

  • guest1/3/2011

    shit happens

  • maybe12/19/2010

    married,39 years,age55, husband ,infidelity for 3 years, split up 4 times, he,s left me, now i,m done, time for,divorse.

  • Jooohhn12/4/2010

    http://blog.bitlogic.biz/

  • Jooohhn12/4/2010

    here are mine three common reasons, please write your opinion

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