Top Ten Rejected Slogans, Catchphrases, and Offers for Dyson Vacuum Cleaners

Crutnacker
Crutnacker, Yahoo! Contributor Network
Mar 25, 2008 "Share your voice on Yahoo! websites. Start Here."
James Dyson is that annoying Brit who tells us, after talking up his vacuum cleaners and his alleged improvement of the hot air hand dryer, that he "just things should work properly." Here are some other slogans he tried out that failed.

10. Dyson -- Because Americans will by anything from a guy with an accent.
9. "I just think appliances should look like Tupperware."
8. Works great on cat hair or I'll pay to have it put to sleep.
7. C'mon, you know that Oreck guy is a wanker.
6. Imagine if I put this kind of ingenuity into British dental care.
5. Dyson -- The most impressively designed piece of crap you'll find at Wal-Mart.
4. "I just think things should cost more."
3. Dyson -- Why spend $75 for a vacuum when you can pay $500 for something more pretenious.
2. Like a Kirby, only made out of the same plastic you find in promotional water bottles.
1. Our vacuums suck more than the competition.

(Disclaimer: Dyson vacuums are well respected and beloved by their owners. This Top 10 list does not reflect the opinions of AC or this broadcasting station. No dust mites were harmed in the making of this article.)

Published by Crutnacker

Freelance writer and business professional from Louisville, Kentucky. Husband, father of one beautiful daughter and three annoying cats. Lived in Maryland, Boston, MA, and Louisville, KY.  View profile

James Dyson's first vacuum was sold in Japan and cost $2000.

11 Comments

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  • no name needed11/11/2009

    wow people dont get to exicted!!!

  • jcorn11/14/2008

    :) I love my Dyson but they are tricky to use on stairways sometimes.

  • Rissa Watkins4/2/2008

    I love my Dyson. Well My hubby loves it- he is usually the one who ends up using it! I am spoiled

  • Crutnacker3/30/2008

    No, I read Consumer Reports and they seem to not find them worth the money. I want one too.

  • Kelly Spies3/30/2008

    lol I like that last one. btw, have you ever tried a dyson I want to but I'm not willing to shell out $500 bucks for one.

  • April Lorier3/29/2008

    OK, I would have voted for #1 for sure! It's truth and sarcasm and snarkiness all rolled up like a chinese eggroll! Very good!

  • Rebecca Foster3/29/2008

    I'm certainly glad you didn't hurt any dust mites!

  • Layla Lair3/27/2008

    As always, very entertaining and good for a laugh. :-)

  • Aly Adair3/27/2008

    ROFL! You are so funny. I love your stuff.

  • saul relative3/25/2008

    Excellent, Crutnacker.

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