Top Ten New Year's Resolutions for Sarah Palin Fans

Sarah Palin - love her, hate her, or just think she is an idiot of historic proportion, you just can't escape her. This fall has seen droves of Palinites drive up to several hours to stand in line for more hours (or even camp overnight) just hoping to get a signed book. Or even better, a chance to see their hero up close.

In an effort to bring Palinites into the light of a clear mind and sound knowledge base, I offer the following potential New Year's Resolutions.

10. Resolve to buy a book - "Going Rouge" is my recommendation for you to start your learning process. It's much more informative and fact-filled than Palin's diatribe, "Going Rogue." Reports are that some have bought Rouge thinking it was Rogue. If you were one of them, don't be ashamed. You made the right choice.

9. Make a New Year's Resolution to buy another book - "Origin of Species" might seem a tad too deep, but if you get right on this one you could be through the important stuff by year's end.

8. Here's a good one - actually look into health care reform. And then ask yourself why fixing what is so obviously broken is such a bad idea.

7. Make a Resolution to seek information in other places than Fox News or Sarah Palin's facebook page.

6. Resolve to take a trip to Alaska.

5. And to stay there!

4. Make a New Year's Resolution to, on just one issue, give President Obama your support. You choose the issue, but be genuine and follow through. You may discover a hidden progressivism in yourself.

3. Resolve to learn more about another country. "You can see it from my house" doesn't build international understanding. It's a big, big world, and it's not all American.

2. Go hunting for President Obama's birth certificate in Kenya. By yourself. On the Serengeti. At night. With "eau de gazelle," the latest in fashion scents.

1. Make a New Year's Resolution to only go to one Tea Party in 2010. And make sure it has plastic tableware and a six-year-old host. You'll find the company more interesting and mature than other Tea Parties you might have been to recently!