Top Ten New Year's Resolutions for Yosemite Sam

Although Tiger Woods currently has a moral dilemma that might make him number one in Google searches, Yosemite Sam, the Warner Brothers/Looney Tunes cartoon character, has extreme personality quirks and an attitude that makes him the wildest, pistol-packing galoot west of the Pecos. All of which may not increase Sam's search engine rankings, but it sure makes him a prime candidate for New Year's resolutions.

For those that might not know Yosemite Sam, there are several YouTube videos that capture the essence of the rough-voiced, sharp-shooting miniature cowboy. I'm a Thinking features Sam and Bugs Bunny in a poker game, and the Yosemite Sam Clip shows Sam entering a saloon and declaring "I'm the roughest, toughest he-man; toughest hombre that ever crossed the Rio Grande-y."

Sam had red hair that stuck out all over, a bulbous nose, bushy eyebrows that seemed to rise half-way up the brim of his hat, and a black mask indicating his status as an outlaw. His handlebar mustache drooped almost to the floor, and he walked on bowed legs and the tiniest feet ever seen on a cowboy. He wore an eleven gallon hat, a pair of pistols on his hips, and talked with what sounded like a throat full of gravel. Mel Blanc did Sam's voice, and because it was such a strain on his vocal chords, he usually recorded Sam's lines after he'd done the other cartoon characters.

Created by animator, Friz Freleng, many felt that Yosemite Sam's character was modeled on Freleng's own personality and looks, including the red hair, grouchy demeanor, and fiery temper.

Here now, with out further ado ... adieu ... oh what the heck, without all that thar stuff 'n' nonsense, are Yosemite Sam's 2010 resolutions.

1. Get a hare cut.
2. Take a %#%$&^ anger management class.
3. Join forces with Elmer Fudd.
4. Catch that consarned rabbit!
5. If that rabbit cain't get caught, take up duck huntin'-Daffy Duck.
6. Quit all that thar %#%$&^ cussin'.
7. Learn how to pronounce "Rio Grande."
8. Quit shootin' at ever' varmint that moves.
9. Find a good woman to settle down with, like Miss Piggy.
10. Take up an honorable profession-maybe poli-ticks. An' if that don't work out, then move to Hawaii, change my name to "Dog" and become a dad-blamed bounty hunter.

Sources:
Embedded links
IMDb, http://www.imdb.com/character/ch0000588/
Wikipedia, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yosemite_Sam
Yosemite Sam, http://www.yosemite-sam.net/Sam/Yosemite-Sam-History-Facts.htm