Touching Songs About Death

When my cousin's wife died of cancer, my mother was looking for a suitable way to honor her in a speech at her funeral. My fondest memory of my cousin's wife was watching her dance like crazy at my brother's wedding. She was a woman who loved life, and a maudlin speech didn't seem right. I pointed my mother to "For a Dancer" by Jackson Browne. These lines summed up how my cousin's wife would have felt about her funeral:

And I cant help feeling stupid standing round
Crying as they ease you down
cause I know that youd rather we were dancing
Dancing our sorrow away

Keep Me In Your Heart -- Warren Zevon

Warren Zevon was a man beloved by many, but by all accounts, not very lovable. He didn't treat his family very well, and his issues with substance abuse and a prickly personality kept him at odds with others. Given Warren's often funny and sardonic lyrics, its hard to believe that he was able to come up with such a lovely song as "Keep Me In Your Heart". Written when he found out he didn't have long to live, the song seems like both an apology and a plea for forgiveness. The lyrics that get me every time are the following:

Hold me in your thoughts, take me to your dreams
Touch me as I fall into view
When the winter comes keep the fires lit
And I will be right next to you

Living Years -- Mike and the Mechanics

This song is about the divide that arises between parents and their children, specifically, the songwriter's struggle with his relationship with his dad. While my own parents and I have had a pretty good relationship, everytime I hear the song, it reminds me that my parents won't live forever, and it is important to let the ones you love know that every time you see them.

The grandfather of my roommate died around the time this song was a hit. My roommate said that the song touched his mother deeply, because it mirrored their relationship. The line that makes me weep here:

I wasn't there that mornin' when my father passed away
I didn't get to tell him, all the things I had to say
I think I caught his spirit later that same year
I'm sure I heard his echo in my baby's newborn tears.
I just wish I could have told him in the living years.

The End -- The Beatles

The last song (with the exception of Her Majesty, a tossed off snippet) from the last album the Beatles recorded together, "The End" has one of the most beautiful lines the band ever recorded. After a chorus that repeats "Love You!" several time, the song ends with:

And In the End
The Love You Take
Is Equal To
The Love You Make

What's Good / Magic And Loss -- Lou Reed

Lou Reed wrote an entire album about dealing with the loss of two friends, including famous songwriter Doc Pomus. The entire album is a powerful work about death and loss, but two songs stick with me from the album. "What's Good" is an almost upbeat song with angry lyrics about how horrible death can be:

What good's a war without killing
What good is rain that falls up
What good's a disease that won't hurt you
Why no good, I guess, no good at all

The final lines of the song are haunting, as Reed almost tosses them away,

What's good ?
Life's good -
But not fair at all

"Magic and Loss" sticks with me for the last lines, which sum up not only death, but the harsh reality of life:

There's a bit of magic in everything
and then some loss to even things out

Tears in Heaven -- Eric Clapton

Tears in Heaven is a song that cannot be separated from the songwriter. In 1991, Eric Clapton's son, Conor, died in a fall from a 53rd story window. Clapton decided to put his emotions into song, and "Tears In Heaven" is the result.

The song always seemed sad to me, but never had much emotional pull to me until I had a child of my own. Clapton's lyrics capture something I can only imagine and hope never to know. Clapton imagines that his young child might not even remember him in heaven, and worse, maybe the connection might be different:

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven

The last lyrics of the song carry a haunting meaning:

I must be strong, and carry on
Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven

Is Clapton saying that it isn't his time yet, or that he's not worthy of heaven? Either way, the song powerfully captures the feelings of someone has tragically lost a child.