Tourist Etiquette in Mexican Homes

If you experience the rare honor of an invitation to someone's home, dress casually but neatly. Men should wear a nice shirt and slacks; women should wear a dress, a skirt and blouse, or a pantsuit. If you are in doubt about the required attire, ask your host or hostess. We have been to parties where nearly everyone dressed in jeans and attractive shirts and blouses. We have also been to parties where everyone is more formally dressed.

Traditional Mexican meals and the times they are eaten take some getting used to. Breakfast can be any time between 6 and 11:30 a.m. and will usually be something light-juice or fruit, coffee, cereal or a pastry. Lunch, the day's largest meal, will be between 1:30 and 4:00 p.m. It usually consists of several courses beginning with soup. A rice or pasta dish or a salad may be a separate course or may accompany the main course. A pork chop, a piece of chicken or some enchiladas, vegetables, beans, tortillas or rolls make up the main course. A dessert (postre) rounds off the meal. Dinner will be around 8 p.m. and is something light. A small portion of the main dish from lunch, a couple of enchiladas or tacos, or a pastry is typical.

If you are having a meal at someone's home, there may be drinks and appetizers before the meal. When everyone has a drink, it is customary for all to raise their glasses and toast one another by saying, "Salud" (to your health). Once everyone sits at the table for the meal, it is customary to wish one another "Buen Provecho" (good appetite.)

The hostess will expect you to try everything served. She will offer you seconds, thirds, and even fourths if you clean your plate. If you don't like a particular dish or if something is too spicy for your taste, don't say anything; just leave most of it on your plate. Otherwise, the hostess will give you another serving. Do accept seconds on the dishes you like and be sure to compliment the hostess.

Sometimes, someone arranges the food on the plates in the kitchen. Sometimes, the hostess places bowls and platters of everything on the table to be passed family style. If the food is buffet style, wait to be asked before serving yourself. The hostess will encourage you to have seconds and will worry about you if you don't eat enough to meet her expectations.

Remember Mexicans invite only close friends and family to their homes. Remembering that, let humility, and politeness govern your actions. Always compliment the host and hostess on their home and compliment the hostess on the food and her cooking (even if she has a maid or cook who prepared the meal).

When to leave after the meal or party can be a little tricky. Take your cue from other guests. The host will not ask you to leave even if he is tired and wants you to go home. To do so would cause him to "lose face". Watch for signs that your hosts are tiring and take your leave, even if they insist that you stay longer. Be gracious and do not overstay your welcome.

Overnight Guest Tourist Etiquette

If you are an overnight guest in a Mexican home, there are certain customs you should know. Many who come for a study vacation in Mexico will opt for the "home stay" with a Mexican family. These will help make your stay enjoyable-not only for you, but also for your hosts.

Maintain an air of formality with your hosts. Use the formal "Usted" until your hosts invite you to use the informal "tu" with them. Don't walk partially clothed or unclothed to the bathroom, put your feet on the furniture, or walk around shoeless in the house.

Be sure to find out mealtimes and observe them. Try to eat a meal out occasionally to ease the burden on your hosts-just be sure to tell them ahead of time so they don't make extra food or wait for you to show up before starting the meal. Take the family out for a meal or two as a gracious way of thanking them for their hospitality.

Offer to help with the dishes, cooking, or cleaning. Your hosts will likely not allow you to do any housework, but will appreciate your offer.

If your hosts have a maid who cleans your room and bathroom, leave her the peso equivalent of a few dollars each week of your stay. If the maid also does your laundry, you should tip her the peso equivalent of two or three dollars each time. Ask your hosts (or another Mexican friend) how much you should tip. Your hosts may tell you not to give the maid a tip, but you should do it anyway.

Begin and end your stay with small gifts for each family member. Mexicans like items that are unique to your area of the United States. They also appreciate pictures of your hometown and family. Children like music CDs and T-shirts. At the end of your stay, you will know your hosts' preferences, so you can give an appropriate gift-candy, perfume, a bottle of aged tequila.

You can never show too much gracious humility in each social encounter. Mexicans have had to endure brash, pushy, loud, rude Americans. Do your part to change their impression of Americans by practicing the suggestions in this article.