Tricia Walsh-Smith and Relationship Rants

In an Associated Press article, we are told that Tricia Walsh-Smith, wife of a rich Broadway theater operator, totally lost it on YouTube and ranted a full 6-minutes worth of divorce fury into the camera for the rest of the globe to gossip about. Tricia seems to be upset over her still-husband attempting to evict her from their New York luxury apartment based upon a prenuptial agreement related to divorce.

Tricia Walsh-Smith really let it fly as she explained that her husband claimed that he couldn't have sex with her because of high blood-pressure problems, and then she found condoms, Viagra, and pornographic material. Husband Philip Smith is a senior citizen. This YouTube video is probably the first of its kind, and ushers in a whole new way of humiliating your erring partner during divorce proceedings.

About 20-years ago, I accidentally landed in a publicly debated messy divorce when our attorney situation spiraled out-of-control. Hubby had the local area high-profile attorney, a drug habit, and had cleaned out all bank accounts; I had what I could afford, a business to run, and the kids. As it turns out, what you can afford in an attorney isn't always the best buy; I fired mine during our first hearing as she was busy telling lies to the judge.

My Donald Trump-ish "You're Fired" yell in court resulted in some interesting gossip for the locals to drool over, and we were on our way. What should have been a quick divorce, turned into years of court-related fun and games. His attorney started the games by assuming that I had business money hidden, and wouldn't believe either of us when we explained over-and-over that the bank accounts were empty.

This "find the money" game was done for the whole purpose of trying to find out where his attorney pay was coming from since my drug-habit hubby was also claiming to be broke. Next, my car disappeared and I filed it as stolen. Then, this high-profile attorney was elected to be a judge... and, guess who had my stolen car? I'll give you a hint, it wasn't hubby.

So, news releases started to paint me as some kind of a monster to get me off of the back of the man who thought that he could get paid by taking my car. Oh... I was in it deep. This attorney-turned-judge wanted his career, and I wanted my car back; and I wanted hubby to pay child support.

At one point, the attorney who took over for the guy becoming a judge decided that hubby should have full custody of my children; this done only to run up fees too, since hubby had a documented abusive history and drugs involved. I reacted to the idea of hubby having the children just like any good Mommy representing herself would react in the extreme court mess that I was in.

On the day of the hearing, I borrowed a friend's truck, went to the storage where I had hubby's things ready for him to pick-up, and grabbed a few goodies to take into the hearing to visually show why hubby should not have custody of the children.

When my moment came to show my evidence... Two friends started marching in the complete truck-load of hubby's long-time porn magazine collection. No, the judge did not keep a straight face... nor did hubby's newest attorney. I had boxes, and boxes, and boxes, of the stuff all piled up along one wall. Yes, I had just returned the ball that was being slammed into my court with bad publicity about me because some official had my stolen car without an explanation. My children were mine - period. End of discussion.

My court related porn story is just the tip of the iceberg on the stories that I went through while trying to get my stolen car back from an official, coupled with a messy public-oriented divorce. My advice to Tricia Walsh-Smith and to anybody else thinking that they can have some fun, or make a point for their divorce by making their lives public on YouTube, or in any other places is: Stop!

In my situation, my life became public because of the actions of others; I responded to a series of individual events being thrown at me. When one side throws a pebble, the other side will throw dirt. When you respond to the dirt with a complete bag of cat-litter, the other side will sweep up the cat-litter, add a little cement, and drop it on you. If you respond to the cement bomb dropped on you with a boulder, the other side will run you over with their dump-truck full of boulders.

I learned a lot while going though years of a messy divorce, alone, that included unusual car complications that no attorney wanted to touch. The first thing that anybody getting divorced has got to know is that attorney's love it when you take all kinds of time that runs up their fee's. What Tricia Walsh-Smith did is going to cost her a pretty penny. The attorney's will take that fun and run up bills on both sides. They don't care about your issues; they care about the pay-time involved with your issues.

Always think about your divorce in terms of your bank account; nobody really cares who did what, explain quickly in order to save your money for your personal restructuring needs after divorce. You lose in divorce; that's just how it goes for both sides. Don't be conned into believing that you have something to gain until you have weighed the bottom line against all attorney fees. I have seen small fortunes spent on tiny issues, don't do it. And, I watched my ex-husband buy into every hearing issue his attorney's told him to have, and come out owning a fortune for the things that we could have settled that first day.

In most states, you can handle your own divorce without an attorney if both sides can agree about what they want. To get information for your state about how to do this, call your local courthouse and ask. I don't recommend trying to represent yourself in court on issues that are in dispute unless you are very good at memorizing the complete thick rule-book quickly. Both sides have to use the same rules, so you have to know the rules to be taken seriously.