Tropic Thunder: The Director's Cut

Don't you just hate bad movies? It kills me to spend the big bucks to go to the big screen to watch Hollywood's latest when I could just wait a few months for the dvd, but as my darling wife always says, "Get me out of the house for two hours or I'm going to Mother's. Permanently." Quite the kidder that wife of mine. But I digress.

Wife permitting, I like to wait for the movies to come to dvd. I like to watch them in the comfort of my home, because my recliner is more comfortable than the standard theater seating, my own snacks are better than the theater's overpriced fare and yes, I'm frugal. Or "cheaper than a nickel candy bar" as those so-called friends of mine say behind my back. Again, I digress.

You've got to admit, there's been a bumper crop of stinky movies released to DVD already and I'm still screening some of the 2008 releases. But of all the stinky movies I've seen lately, I personally nominate Tropic Thunder, the Director's Cut as the worst of the worst. Ben Stiller, Robert Downey Jr and Jack Black star in this stupid, stupid movie. The only thing worse than the lousy plot is the grade school humor. Three actors dropped into a real war zone could make for a great movie idea, but not the way this version was done. From gag-o-matic decapitated bodies to the beyond foul language, this movie sucked more than than any Dyson vacuum. Think about it, here you have major actors from Iron Man, Night at the Museum and School of Rock and this bomb was the best they could do? I don't know which is worse, the writers who wrote this travesty to the language (Ben Stiller, Justin Theroux and Etan Cohen) or the director who brought it into stunted, deformed cinematic life (Ben Stiller). If pandering grade school bathroom humor was a crime, Stiller, Downey Jr and Black would all get the electric chair.

With appearances by Tobey Maguire (Spiderman), Matthew McConaughey (Failure To Launch) and Nick Nolte (48 Hours), the star power was there to produce another Gone With The Wind but instead we got this flop. How do you have this much talent and turn out a movie this bad? At least all the stars have firmly established careers from better movies or else they might find themselves looking for a new line of work.

I think this movie made something like $180 million dollars so the actors earned their massive paychecks, but it would have been nice to see a really good movie from the talent assembled, not something made to appeal to grade school foul mouthed humor. Surely Ben Stiller can write better material, and we know he can act better than this, so why doesn't he? Isn't there any demand for good movies these days? Ben, there is a big difference between producing a body of work and churning out something to turn a quick buck. Here's hoping you do better next time out.