Truly Preparing for a Parent-Teacher Conference

Sometimes you forget the past. As a teacher caught up in the rigor of my daily tasks, I often forget what it was like to be a kid. At times, I think I am the teacher I told myself I would never become. I wanted to be a cool teacher. Now, twenty years later, I realize that being "cool" may not correlate to being effective. But I still feel guilty when I assign a detention for missing a homework assignment.

In order to increase our effectiveness as teachers, from time to time we must look into our pasts. Reexamining the past keeps you in tuned with your inner child. It allows you to better connect with your students. When I look back on my past I remember vividly a good friend name Willie. Reevaluating his situation gave me insights into preparing for parent-teacher conferences.

Willie was my best childhood friend. We shared many hobbies and musical interests. He introduced me to LL Cool J and I am forever indebted to him for exposing me to hip-hop music. On the playground Willie was the most athletic kid on the field. Outside the classroom, Willie excelled. However, inside the confines of the four walls, he was the teacher's worst nightmare. And Willie worked hard at maintaining that reputation. He was winning each time the teacher got upset. Each time he made a fellow student laugh at the teacher's expense, he gave himself a point. When we all burst out laughing as a group at someone he was making fun of (usually the teacher), Willie scored even more. Willie enjoyed the attention of being the class clown and he worked daily to maintain his reputation.

In response to Willie's actions, the teacher would instinctively call home, assign him detentions and suspensions, and order him to the office. All of these disciplinary actions were unsuccessful. Willie continued his tirade until he eventually moved on to high school.

Clearly when a situation like this one arises, parents need to be informed but I would not rush into a phone call or parent conference. As teachers we need to do a little homework ourselves. It would be nice if one phone call could fix everything but for most cases, it is not that easy. We need to get to the root of the problem and try to understand our students. Why is he behaving like this? When does he start to act up? Is it during math time, his weakest subject? Does he act up during his favorite subject? Are there potential disabilities or weaknesses we can identify? Numerous questions need to be considered to fully understand our students. After forming some insights, teachers should plan some classroom interventions. Documentation is crucial for future review. Finally, if interventions prove to be ineffective, enlisting the help of parents would be appropriate. At this time a parent conference should be set up.

Because we have already done our homework and analyzed the potential causes of Willie's problems we can constructively present the problems to his parents. In addition, the information that we have gathered will also illustrate that we are indeed concerned for Willie's welfare. Parents need to be assured that you value and cherish their children. Once a parent realizes that their child is special to you, they are on your team and ready to work with you for the best interests of their child. Therefore a parent-conference will proceed with each party openly sharing information and trying to cooperatively develop ideas and resolutions.

The last time I checked, Willie, 32, had just been released from the county jail. Could Willie's outcome have been altered just a little if his teacher, while Willie was at the impressionable age of 13, took a little more time to understand him?