TV & Movies Versus the Real World

Film and TV are make belief. Everybody knows that. The whole idea is to escape from the real world for a little while and dream about how it could be. Or the exact opposite, see how bad some people have it, how they suffer, so we can gloat and feel good about our own, miserable life. Some movies or series are supposed to show us familiar, recognizable situations that provide us with an aha-erlebnis. In order to do so, writers better stay clear from some of the cliches they keep showing us which makes scenes totally unbelievable. A short list.

Ever been to a hospital? I have. Way too often to my liking, I might add. What I do know is that your average nurse looks nothing like the ones you see in ER, Grey's Anatomy or even Scrubs for that matter. I always thought the idea was to get out of the hospital as soon as possible, where these nurses (and doctors) make me want to cut myself so I can stay a few days longer.

High school students in movies are smart, know the presidents of every single country in the world, are fluent in 7 languages and go on dates every single night of the week. In my school days, students hardly knew any 6-letter words, didn't manage to be average in their mother tongue and severe acne attacks kept them at home most week-ends playing computer games eating pizza.

On TV, the girl next door turns into a cover model by just changing her shoes, loosening her hair and loosing her glasses in favor of lenses. When my neighbor does that, she still looks ugly. When she wakes up in the morning, her hair doesn't look like she spent 10 hours in a salon.

After a heavy night out, it takes me 3 days to recover, not just 3 hours of sleep and one aspirin. My clothes the next morning definitely do not look like they come straight from the dry-cleaners, they rather look like something I just picked out of the gutter.

When a soldier looses an arm on screen, he still doesn't want to give up and will keep on fighting for his country. When my colleague coughs, she runs to the doctor and has to stay at home for at least 4 weeks.

An average Joe or Jane will run away from a fire, not towards it, even if they hear the house hamster squeak.

Whenever being chased, it is apparently really important to scream as loud as possible, to make it a bit easier for your attacker to locate you. Don't worry, even in the smallest alley there will always be an open door at the end.

Don't worry about having an affair. Even if you get caught in bed with your insignificant other, people will accidentally walk into the room without noticing the other person underneath the sheets. When I as much as look at another girl in a bar, it takes me a week to explain myself.

Whatever is being shot in a movie, whether it's human, alien or an animal, it will jump up again at least once after being shot in the heart 15 times. Don't try this one at home, but one shot will most probably kill anything.

There's lots of other examples, but if the writers want to take care of these to start with, that would be great. If you would please excuse me now, As the World Turns is about to start.