Two Obsessive-Compulsive People Living Together

"Do I look fat? Do I look fat? Do I look fat? Do I look fat?..."

Did you ever wonder what it might be like for two people with OCD - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, to live together? I can tell you firsthand because it's like that in my home and we just had a severe episode. Sometimes we both have different symptoms of it though.

I was diagnosed with severe OCD - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, fourteen years ago. The whole "nine yards" of it - fear of contamination, checking, repeating, ruminating, the rituals, perfectionism.... For very many years my OCD was so bad that I was unable to leave my home and the few times I could, I couldn't do it alone. I have been in psychotherapy for all of those fourteen years - sometimes seeing more than one counselor at a time and I must say, I have improved. Those objects I had a fear of contamination of have decreased and I have learned to manage better the fears I still have. I check less, repeat less, hardly ruminate and I have learned and accepted not doing everything "perfectly." I haven't improved completely, but there's a big difference from where I used to be, to where I am now.

Understandably, the sound and thinking of my own thoughts ruminating in my head drove me crazy. It exhausted me, made me feel like I was going "nuts" and gave me migraine headaches. To help you understand what I'm trying to explain here, imagine a record, or a CD getting stuck and repeating the same thing over and over and over. Eventually, we'll go over to it and fix it, or shut it off because the repeating is extremely annoying and irritating. That's what ruminating thoughts and words are like when I'm saying them to myself. I found out the hard way - by experience, that others doing the same thing out loud in my presence, has most of the same effects on me - making me feel like I am going "crazy" and giving me migraine headaches.

I started this article off with "Do I look fat? Do I look fat? Do I look fat? Do I look fat?..." because that was just asked to me (at least that many times - one right after the other) and it's a perfect example. No matter how many times I said, "No. No. No. No." it still didn't make a difference, or make the question stop.

How can I make it stop? I said, "I have a migraine headache," but that didn't make it stop. Nothing was doing any good. My repeated, "No" wasn't believable I guess - because the question persisted. Was it a game? Was it just to make conversation? I don't know. Was it seriously a symptom of that person's OCD? Whatever it was, it clashed with my OCD. I tried explaining, "You're driving me nuts," but it still didn't stop. Finally I screamed, "STOP!!!!!! and I felt the blood rush to my head and I started shaking. Then I was talked of as being the "nutty (crazy) one." The whole situation was so stressful to me that I felt like crying afterwards.

My psychotherapist would have suggested I go into another room. I am tired and I was trying to write at least one article tonight, to get it done. Next time I will walk away - no matter what. It's to save my sanity and instead of being an enabler by repeatedly answering the question - but not doing any good, it will help the other person too. I will walk away without making it obvious, to put an end to the stressful situation.

If you are ever in a similar situation, walk away too - without being obvious.