Understanding Our Father's Love

I always knew I wanted to be a mother. I knew that if I were ever blessed with children, I would love them to the ends of the earth. I never understood, though, just how much love I was capable of. From the day my children were born, I loved them. And every day that goes by, I love them more - even when I think that it's not possible to love them more than I already do. I love to watch them learn, play and sleep. Nothing in the world compares to the great feeling of peace you experience when your baby lays down on you to go to sleep. Nuzzling their soft baby hair and listening to them breathe - it makes me wish I could pause those moments forever. And when they can say, "I love you, Mommy" or they ask for a hug, I just feel blessed beyond anything I can comprehend. I wish they could understand how deeply I love them.

I never want anything bad to happen to my children. When I hear about kids who have cancer or who were killed in an accident, I can't help but think, "What if that had been my son or one of my daughters?" It makes me feel as though I can't breathe. It's scary to love someone so much. I'd do anything for them, including giving up my own life to save them.

The love I have for my children has begun helping me understand in a very small way just how much God loves us. Most people have heard the verse John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have eternal life." (NIV) I know I've wondered before why Jesus had to be the one to suffer and die to save the world. Why would God send his only Son to die? If He loves us so much, why not go Himself?

I love my kids more than I love anyone or anything else. If a group of people were being held hostage and were all going to die unless someone volunteered to die in their place, I think (although I don't know for sure since I've never been in that situation) that I might consider sacrificing myself so that those people could live. I know without a doubt, though, that I would never let anyone take any of my children from me so that others could live. I could never allow my children to suffer so that others could have life. God sent His Son - He paid a price more dear than what I can even comprehend. They say that God turned away from Jesus when He was dying on the cross - I believe it's because He couldn't stand to see His Son suffering.

I wonder if, during those last hours before Jesus' death, God hoped that His Son would decide He couldn't go through with it. I wonder if His heart leapt when Jesus asked for "this cup" to be taken from Him in the Garden of Gethsemene. Did disappointment set in when Jesus added, "Not my will, but yours be done." After all, it was the world Jesus was dying for. A world filled not with perfect and good people, but with sinners and people who cursed Him, rejected Him or refused to believe that He even exists. He was dying for people who would never accept the gift of salvation. He was dying for people who, even after receiving that gift, would continue to sin and even take their salvation for granted. And God, His Father, sent Him to die for those people - for you and me.

I am overwhelmed, sometimes, by the love I have for my kids. I don't know if they will ever understand how much I love them. I realize now that God must feel the same way about us; can we ever understand the depth of His love for us? Can we understand what He sacrificed on the cross for us? The amazing thing is that even if we never understand - even if we reject His love - He did it anyway. He loved the world so much that He sent His only Son. Now that I'm a mother, and I see how intensely I love my kids, I am beginning to catch just a glimpse of how great our Heavenly Father's love is for us.